Turnabout Highschool
by BrDPirateMan
Summary: Miles Edgeworth goes vacationing in Japan to visit his cousin Mina. Both of them end up embroiled in a murder case. Includes gameplay elements from AAIME, including investigations, arguments and rebuttals! Now updated to look better and clearer.
1. Chapter 1

**TURNABOUT HIGHSCHOOL, Part 1  
by BrDPirateMan  
****Genre: Crime / Mystery / Parody / Cross-over  
**

Turnabout Highschool has been recently edited. Missing punctuation marks have been added, the map has been altered a little and several other things have been done to, in short, make this story more visually presentable. But the story is still intact. Enjoy!

**March 14, ? ? ?  
? ? ?**

? ? ?: *pant* *pant* H-How... How did this happen... It's not supposed to be like this... I don't have a choice now. I'm going to have to cover this up.  
? ? ?: But what will we do? !  
? ? ?: Don't worry, I think I've already thought of something. It's nothing a prodigy like me can't handle. But I need you to help me...  
? ? ?: Are you sure this will be alright? !  
? ? ?: Better than being caught by the cops.  
? ? ?: A-Alright... I'll help you... for your sake...

**March 14, 2:33 pm  
Seiko High School  
Entrance  
**  
Edgeworth: I'm finally here. Well, it's always nice to take a break every now and then and go abroad.

...

Edgeworth: (My name is Miles Edgeworth. I'm a prosecutor working in America, and my job is to find the guilty party in a variety of crimes, usually homicide. I'm currently taking a break from work to relax in Japan, so I thought that while I'm here, I might as well pay a visit to my cousin, whom I'm rather close with, despite the distance between our two home countries.)

...

Edgeworth: Now where is she? She said she'd meet me here.  
? ? ?: Heyyy! Edgey, you finally came!  
Edgeworth: *sigh* You would still call me "Edgey"? Really, Mina, of all the nicknames to pick...  
Mina: It's a friendly nickname! Besides, you're my cousin, so it's alright!  
Edgeworth: I don't see the logic in that, and I've been a prosecutor for some time already...  
Mina: Or shall I call you "Miley" instead? It's your choice!  
Edgeworth: Th-That will be even worse! Anyway, I'm here to take a look around because I've never had the chance to see how your school is like. By the way, tell me again why you're here in school on a Saturday? I mean, there's hardly anyone here.  
Mina: My friends are having cheerleading practice. It's for the basketball match in a week's time. So I thought I'd come and check them out. Why don't you come and take a look too?  
Edgeworth: Well, why not. I'm here to relax after all.  
Mina: We also have a guy cheerleader's uniform and a spare set of pom-poms. If you like, you can join in the fun!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* WH- No, no thanks! ! ! (If I went along and Detective Gumshoe knew, he'd have a field day telling everyone about it... and I doubt a cut to his salary would stop him...)

...

Edgeworth: (This girl is my cousin, Mina. She is a student in Seiko High School and stays with her family in Japan. Like I said earlier, I'm quite close with her. We often exchange e-mails about our lives in our respective countries, so even though we don't see each other very much, we're still up to date with each other's daily affairs.)

...

Mina: Oh, Edgey, by the way, did you sign in at security?  
Edgeworth: Yes. The security guard, Ms Yashiro, told me to sign in the visitors' logbook and gave me a visitor's pass too.  
Mina: You didn't sign in the wrong logbook, did you? There are logbooks for students and teachers to use in the event that they should come to school on a holiday.  
Edgeworth: I signed in the correct one alright. ...You know, it strikes me how tight the school's security is. I mean, the security guard was overly enthusiastic, for one thing.  
Mina: Ms Uzuki Yashiro is always like that. She's always like "Sir!" and all... Her partner, Mr Koki Kariya, however, is really lazy. But he's laid-back and fun to be around with, so it's okay!  
Edgeworth: (A lazy security guard? I can't say I'm too happy to hear that, but at least he's not as bad as a certain old lady stalker whom I know of... *shudder*)

**March 14, 2:49 pm  
Seiko High School  
Gymnasium  
**  
Ai: Alright, you guys! After the count of three, we twirl round once, and...  
Edgeworth: So this is your gym...  
Mina: It's pretty big, don't you think? We hold lots of activities and events in here!  
Edgeworth: Mina, are you in the cheerleader squad too?  
Mina: Me? No... I'm not interested. Besides, my footwork isn't that great.  
Edgeworth: *chuckles* I guess dancing was never in your genes.  
Mina: Hey! But... But my footwork isn't all hopeless. I mean, I'm good at hopscotch, you know!  
Edgeworth: (Talk about your non sequiturs...)  
Ai: Oh, Mina! You're here too! Um, and who's this? Your... boyfriend?  
Mina: No, he's my cousin from America.  
Edgeworth: My name is Miles Edgeworth and I'm a prosecutor. I came to Japan on holiday, so I thought I'd take a look around.  
Ai: Whoa there, no need to be so formal! Call me Ai! So anyway, this is your first time here? Well, make yourself at home! We're having cheerleading practice, but you're welcome to watch.  
Edgeworth: *takes a bow* Ah, thank you for the offer. I was looking forward to a relaxing afternoon.  
Mina: *grins cheekily* You just want to see a bunch of girls in mini-skirts and belly shirts, Edgey...  
Edgeworth: I a-assure you that's not the reason...  
Mina: ...I mean, working with so many cases for so long, you must have some heavily repressed urges, right?  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Mina? ! That was the most horribly inappropriate thing to say! ! !  
Ai: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: (From the look on Ai's face, she seems to believe Mina. *grumble*)

Edgeworth, Mina and a few of her other friends - namely Shiki and Beat - were sitting in the stalls watching the cheerleader squad in action.

Shiki: So, Mr Edgeworth, you're a lawyer, huh?  
Edgeworth: Not just any lawyer. I'm a prosecutor. In every case that I work on, there is a guilty party, and my job is to seek him out and expose his lies.  
Shiki: Hey, a lot of people don't like lawyers. What do you think about that?  
Edgeworth: Ahaha... That's just a hopelessly mangled misinterpretation of the facts. The lawyers who give such a bad impression are usually the ones who send the innocent to jail, or free the guilty of all convictions. And those lawyers... they probably have a way with the evidence they keep. But that's something I don't think I should talk about yet.  
Shiki: *sweats* I'm afraid I don't follow.  
Mina: You know, I kinda agree, Edgey. Your way of explaining things is too complex.  
Beat: Dude, yo... That was a little too deep, man. All I know is... lawyers send people to jail, right? !  
Edgeworth: *sweats* W-Well, if you put it that way, then yes... (Maybe I really have been working for too long... if even my simplest of explanations can get so technical...)

Suddenly, a boy with striking orange hair rushed into the gym.

Neku: G-Guys! *pant* *pant* Come quick!  
Ai: Wh-What's wrong?  
Neku: Ms... Ms Konishi... She's... Hurry! Come with me! She's lying unconscious on the ground!  
Shiki: What? !  
Beat: The Iron Maiden? ! Where, yo? !  
Neku: In Corridor W-1! Come on!  
Edgeworth: One of your teachers is hurt? ! We must hurry!

Edgeworth, Mina and her pack of friends raced off, led by Neku.

**March 14, 2:55 pm  
Seiko High School  
Corridor W-1  
**  
True enough, there lay the teacher Ms Konishi on the floor at the foot of a staircase, her forehead stained with blood and her glasses cracked. Another girl, whose name was Eri, was standing nearby, shuddering at the sight. The security guard Koki Kariya was there too, speechless.

Mina: Kyaaah!  
Beat: BWAAAAH!  
Shiki: Ms Konishi!  
Eri: *uneasy* ...  
Kariya: Um... This is bad.  
Edgeworth: Ms Konishi, are you okay? ! Can you hear me? ! *tries to feel the pulse on her neck* ...! (There's no pulse... And also... Oh no! Is she...? !)  
? ? ?: Hey! What're you doing, you hectopascal? !  
Edgeworth: Huh?  
Ai: Mr Minamimoto!  
Sho: Don't touch her! And hurry, call the cops!

Edgeworth took a few steps to the bottom of the stairs so he could see Sho Minamimoto, the math teacher, on the landing of the staircase. He was about to clamber down the steps. His tone was urgent.

Sho: Well, hurry! Call the police!  
Shiki: Uh, alright!  
Edgeworth: Wait, shouldn't we call an ambulance instead? !  
Sho: You're so zetta slow! Step on it and call the police! ! !  
Neku: Uh... alright! *whips out cell phone*  
Edgeworth: (Ms Konishi... I don't know if I'm right, but... it might be too late for her...)

Sho leapt down the stairs and called Ms Konishi's name, over and over again. But she didn't wake up.

The police arrived soon enough. They immediately began taking pictures of the scene.

Edgeworth: (Everyone's in shock. Who'd have expected a dead body to turn up in the school they're so familiar with?)  
Mina: Edgey... Ms Konishi... Is she...  
Edgeworth: ...I'm afraid she didn't make it.  
Mina: This... This is terrible...  
Edgeworth: Judging by the wound on her forehead, it would appear that she died when she was hit on the head.  
Mina: She's never taught us before, but she's infamous for being very strict and totally unreasonable sometimes.  
Edgeworth: Really?  
Mina: That's why she's nicknamed "The Iron Maiden"... behind her back, of course. She was never popular, but seeing her like this... I can't help but feel sad...  
Edgeworth: Whenever a life is taken away, it's always sad... (But...is it just me, or is there something more to this? No... maybe not. I'm overimagining things again. *sigh* Another side-effect of working on too many homicide cases, I guess...)  
Mina: ...  
Edgeworth: (No, I can't shake off this feeling! Looking at this scene, I just know somebody is responsible for this, but I don't know if it's someone from outside of this school.) Mina.  
Mina: Y-Yes, Edgey?  
Edgeworth: I got a hunch. Can you accompany me to security?  
Mina: Sure, but why?  
Edgeworth: I want to take a look at their visitors' logbook.  
Mina: Are you looking for something?  
Edgeworth: To tell you the truth, Mina, I don't think this is any accident!  
Mina: What?  
Edgeworth: I can't put my finger on it, but there's more than meets the eye. So I want to see if there were any visitors apart from me today. Every visitor has to sign in there, right?  
Mina: Yes... But, if it's no accident, then what else can it be?  
Edgeworth: Murder.  
Mina: What? ! That's ridiculous!  
Edgeworth: Maybe it is, but still, I'd like to take a look at the visitors' logbook.  
Mina: *sigh* You're been working on too many cases, Edgey. But fine, let's go.

(At the security station.)

Uzuki: Here you go, Mr Edgeworth. Here's your copy of today's entries in the visitors' logbook! Sir!  
Edgeworth: Thank you very much. By the way, Ms Yashiro-  
Uzuki: Yes sir!  
Edgeworth: I understand that on public holidays, students and teachers are required to sign in their corresponding logbooks...  
Uzuki: Absolutely, sir! In the event that the school's facilities need to be used, students must sign in the students' logbook... while teachers have to fill in the teachers' logbook. I make sure no one gets by me without signing!  
Edgeworth: Ah, thanks for the info-  
Uzuki: You're welcome, sir!  
Edgeworth: -but you might want to turn down the cheeriness a little. It hurts the ears.  
Uzuki: Yes sir! Thank you for the advice, sir!  
Edgeworth: *sigh* (This is one enthusiastic security guard...) Now let's see...  
Mina: Look, Edgey, your name is written here, along with your signature. But there's no one else.  
Edgeworth: And the time I checked in is 2:30 pm.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Visitors' logbook  
**There were no other visitors apart from me today. I checked in at 2:30 pm.]

Mina: So wh-what does this mean? If there are no other visitors... does it mean you're a suspect? But that's ridiculous...  
Edgeworth: Of course I'm innocent, Mina. Which means that the killer is someone from this school, and he or she has not left yet! Also, let's see which students and teachers came to school today.  
Mina: Hmmm... Well, there aren't many. There's me, Ai, Neku, Shiki, Beat, Eri, and a whole bunch of other girls who are the cheerleaders. Oh, and there's Sho Minamimoto, the math teacher, and Ms Konishi.  
Edgeworth: I see.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**List of attendees  
**Students who came today include: Mina, Ai, Neku Sakuraba, Shiki Misaki, Daisukenojo Bito (Beat), and Eri. Teachers: Sho Minamimoto and Mitsuki Konishi. None of them have left the school premises yet.]

(Back at Corridor W-1.)

Edgeworth: Who's in charge of this investigation?  
Forensics: Sir! We're told it's Detective Megumi Kitaniji, sir!  
Edgeworth: I see. Where is he? I'd like to have a word with him.  
Forensics: He hasn't arrived yet, but he'll be here shortly, sir!  
Edgeworth: *sigh* This is taking too long. Well, waiting here isn't going to produce any results. Mina, let's get this investigation started.  
Mina: What investigation?  
Edgeworth: Why, the investigation of this suspected murder case, of course! And I want you to help me.  
Mina: Me? ! Wh-Why?  
Edgeworth: You know about this school better than I do. I could investigate this with a teacher, but he's a suspect for the time being. And the security guards have their hands full being interrogated by the police. So you're going to be my assistant for now. Two pairs of eyes would streamline our investigation.  
Mina: Oh, I see!  
Edgeworth: But this is serious. Don't fool around!  
Mina: Okay! First I'll see if I can borrow a uniform from the security guard and-  
Edgeworth: *stern* There's no need to dress up for this, Mina! Just help me!  
Mina: Awww...

**BEGIN INVESTIGATION  
**  
Edgeworth: Let's make a few notes about the crime scene.  
Mina: What should we look at?  
Edgeworth: The position of the body in relation to its surroundings would make a great first step. Take note of everything!  
Mina: Hmmm... The body is lying in front of this door.  
Edgeworth: That door... it's the janitor's closet?  
Mina: Yeah.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Crime scene notes  
**Victim's body located in front of janitor's closet.]

_MAP OF CRIME SCENE  
_

|^^^^|  
|^^^^|-XXX-

... … … …V

X = door (janitor's closet)  
V = location of victim's body (_please ignore the dots_)  
^ = stairs

Edgeworth: Let's see what else we can find.

Something about Ms Konishi caught Edgeworth's eye. Her glasses.

Edgeworth: Look at Ms Konishi's glasses. Don't you think something is off about them?  
Mina: Um, no... They look pretty normal to me. Although I have to admit they're kinda cool.  
Edgeworth: Actually, I was referring to how... cracked the lenses are. Not just cracked, but...practically falling apart. Much of the glass is missing. How did her glasses end up like this anyway?  
Mina: Where's the missing glass? I mean, look! Her glasses are almost hollow frames now!  
Edgeworth: I should ask the forensics team about this. Hey you! Your team combed this area thoroughly, right?  
Forensics: Yes, sir! We've secured this area, sir!  
Edgeworth: Very well, tell me if you found any glass fragments around here.  
Forensics: No, sir! None whatsoever, sir!  
Edgeworth: Hmmm... Are you sure you checked?  
Forensics: Affirmative, sir! Absolutely spanking positive, sir!  
Mina: *sweats* Are all policemen this uptight, Edgey?  
Edgeworth: They're supposed to be, Mina. It's their job to stay alert and, most importantly, proper.  
Mina: Maybe it's because you were glaring at them so menacingly that they're all "Sir!" and stuff.  
Edgeworth: *stern gaze* ...  
Mina: WAAAH! J-Just kidding, Edgey! D-Don't look at me like that!  
Edgeworth: So here we have our first mystery. If her glasses are damaged, where did the glass shards go?

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Victim's glasses already broken?  
**We couldn't find all the shards to fully reconstruct the victim's glasses. Where are those shards?

Edgeworth: Aha! This is my first piece of Logic.  
Mina: Um... Logic?  
Edgeworth: Whenever something of interest pops up in an investigation, the chances are good that it's tied up with something relevant. If I find two related pieces of Logic and connect them, I can draw out a hypothesis and new information arises.  
Mina: So maybe I'm a bit off, but... it's like if I have an apple and orange and mix them together, I get a fruit salad. Right?  
Edgeworth: Um... if it helps you grasp the concept of Logic, then yes, it's something like that.  
Mina: Oh! That's awesome! Alright, Edgey! I'm ready to make banana splits out of our crime scene! Though... all this talk about food is making me a little hungry...  
Edgeworth: (How did such a serious conversation turn into something completely unrelated?)

Edgeworth examined the wound in closer detail.

Edgeworth: She was hit very, very hard for blood to gush out like this.  
Mina: Ugh... Just looking at her messed up like that makes me queasy... it's like her head is a rotten, squishy melon. Beaten to a pulp with a mallet...  
Edgeworth: Mina, how is it that even when disgusted by the sight, you can still come up with a description even more disgusting in comparison to the crime scene?  
Mina: I'm just saying how I feel! Isn't it spot-on anyway? !  
Edgeworth: (Yes, spot-on... and very disturbing.) Excuse me, lab guy.  
Forensics: Yes, sir!  
Edgeworth: What have you found out about the head wound? Anything that stands out?  
Forensics: Well, it's really gross and gruesome, sir! Like a rotten, squishy melon being beaten to a pulp with a mallet!  
Mina: See! I told you anyone would think the way I would!  
Edgeworth: (I have nothing to say to that...) W-Well, that's not what I meant. Did you find anything about the wound that is worth mentioning?  
Forensics: Um, we concluded that she was hit twice in the same area, sir!  
Edgeworth: Twice?  
Forensics: There are two layers of blood splatter on her forehead, sir: the newer, fresher one on top of the older one. It's not easy to tell, but that's what we found out. So that means she was hit twice.

[**EVIDENCE** updated.

**Crime scene notes  
**Victim was hit in the forehead twice.]

Edgeworth: Whoever killed her must be very thorough.  
Mina: Yeah... It's pretty horrible, really. But it kinda makes sense. I mean, I would chew my food thoroughly to make sure it's properly digested!  
Edgeworth: (Again, the discussion turns to food. Does this girl ever stop thinking about her stomach?)

**INVESTIGATION COMPLETE  
**  
? ? ?: Move! Move, please! Coming through!  
Mina: Huh? Who's that?  
? ? ?: Finally, I've come to the crime scene... Sorry I'm late. I got caught up with a few things.  
Forensics: We've done all that we can, sir! Don't worry!  
? ? ?: Ah, that is good to know. Let's see... Hmmm, oh, so that's what's going on... Hmmm!  
Edgeworth: Um... Excuse me...  
? ? ?: Hmm? What are you doing here at the crime scene?  
Edgeworth: ...I think it's more polite for you to ask questions of someone after you know who they are.  
? ? ?: Ah, my apologies. I'm Detective Megumi Kitaniji, from the homicide department of the Japanese Police. I'm here to oversee the investigation.  
Edgeworth: I'm Miles Edgeworth, a prosecutor from America. I'm here in Japan for a short holiday. And this is my cousin, Mina.  
Megumi: So, I believe you have something to ask me?  
Edgeworth: Detective Kitaniji, if you don't mind, I'd like to participate in your investigation efforts. I've been involved in several homicide cases by now, and I'd like to help.  
Megumi: I understand that you want to help. But...  
Mina: But what?  
Megumi: Unfortunately, Mr Edgeworth, your position as a prosecutor doesn't mean you're not excluded from the list of suspects. You too are under scrutiny from the Japanese Police. In fact, looking at the information thus far... I think you are the most likely suspect!  
Edgeworth: ? !  
Mina: Are you crazy? ! Edgey would never kill anyone! You're just jumping to conclusions!  
Edgeworth: It's okay, Mina.  
Mina: What? ! Now you're the crazy one! You'd willingly become a suspect? !  
Edgeworth: *smiles* Calm down, my dear cousin. We both know I'm innocent. And it's quite easily proven too. Detective Kitaniji, maybe you could enlighten me on what you think.  
Megumi: Very well.  
Mina: This nut-case thinks you're the culprit! What are you going to do, Edgey?  
Edgeworth: That's simple. I'll cross-examine him.  
Mina: Cross...examine?  
Edgeworth: During a cross-examination, I listen to the witness' testimony and try to find the contradictions within. Because sometimes, witnesses lie from time to time.  
Mina: But he's a detective! Would he lie? !  
Edgeworth: No, he wouldn't. But it's highly likely that he might simply get his facts wrong.  
Mina: Oh... Like now.  
Edgeworth: So anyway, when I find such a contradiction, I point it out, but my argument wouldn't make sense unless I present the right evidence. Cross-examination is a very engaging process. You have to stay alert and listen well!  
Mina: Wow! That sounds exciting! Can you teach me? !  
Edgeworth: Sure. I'll even show you how it's done. Watch.  
Megumi: *chuckle* If you're done teaching your little student, allow me to make my first argument.

**ARGUMENT by Detective Megumi Kitaniji  
Megumi's Logic  
**  
Megumi: Notwithstanding the lack of a motive, the fact remains that you killed Ms Konishi, Mr Edgeworth.  
You brought her to the stairs and waited for a chance...  
Then you pushed her, where she tumbled down the stairs to her death!  
That is how you killed Ms Konishi.

Edgeworth: If she was killed in that way, anyone could have pushed the victim and caused her death all the same, Detective!  
Megumi: Really? Then try and counter my logic, and you'll see it holds up.  
Mina: Oh no, his argument made sense! Edgey, we're doomed!  
Edgeworth: Hold yourself together, Mina! The fun has only begun. The fun of ripping his logic to pieces!  
Mina: What? ! You're sick, I tell you!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* WH- I was just kidding! (Rrmph... My humour needs work...)

_[Note: Arguments and testimonies given by witnesses are enclosed in square brackets. They are separate statements that Edgeworth can PRESS for more information, or PRESENT evidence to.]  
_  
**REBUTTAL  
Megumi's Logic  
**  
Megumi: [_Notwithstanding the lack of a motive, the fact remains that you killed Ms Konishi, Mr Edgeworth._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Why would I kill Ms Konishi if I had no reason?  
Megumi: I'm not saying you didn't have a motive. There's always a reason behind everything, after all. But as the motive has not been determined, this argument would have to ignore that fact.  
Mina: Edgey's not the type to go around killing people! He's a prostitute for Pete's sake!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* WH- It's PROSECUTOR! Get it right! ! !  
Mina: Uh... Yeah, what he said! He's a procrastinator! And if you keep insisting that he's the culprit, he'll totally procrastinate you! ...Wait, that doesn't sound right...  
Edgeworth: Rrgh... -_-+  
Megumi: Hahaha! Dear me. Looks like someone is in need of some extra English lessons. Anyway...

Megumi: [_You brought her to the stairs and waited for a chance..._]

[_Then you pushed her, where she tumbled down the stairs to her death!_]

[**EVIDENCE - Crime scene notes**]

**OBJECTION!  
**  
Edgeworth: Detective Kitaniji, your hypotheis is entirely... impossible.  
Megumi: Excuse me?  
Edgeworth: The reason is right before your very eyes.

_MAP OF CRIME SCENE  
_

|^^^^|  
|^^^^|-XXX-

... … … …V

X = door (janitor's closet)  
V = location of victim's body (_please ignore the dots_)  
^ = stairs

Edgeworth: If I had pushed the victim down the stairs, her body would be at the bottom of the stairs, wouldn't it? And yet, here it is a good distance away from the spot where it should be!  
Megumi: *recoils* What? !  
Edgeworth: The victim was not pushed down. Her body was brought here, probably after she was killed!  
Megumi: Mmph! Good point... but, it still doesn't change the fact that you are the killer! You may have proven that the victim was not killed in the manner I described earlier, but you still haven't proven that it wasn't you who killed her!  
Edgeworth: *chuckles* I know. But I'm ready to prove my innocence.  
Mina: How can you smile like that at a time like this, Edgey? ! If you weren't my cousin, I'd slap you for being so... so... abnormal!  
Edgeworth: Now now, Mina, you know I'm innocent, so there's no real reason to worry too much.

**ARGUMENT by Detective Megumi Kitaniji  
Megumi's Logic, Pt 2  
**  
Megumi: I'll admit that you didn't shove the victim down the stairs like I claimed just now.  
You probably killed her elsewhere by bludgeoning her in the head with a blunt weapon...  
Then you brought her body here, to Corridor W-1.  
And as you a full-grown man, you easily have the strength to do so.  
By the way, judging from the rigor mortis in the victim's body, you most likely killed her quite some time ago.

Edgeworth: Still adamant about me being the killer, I see.  
Mina: Edgey, I'm scared.  
Edgeworth: Scared? Why is that?  
Mina: If you can't smash his theory, you'll get arrested, right?  
Edgeworth: ...Even in the darkest of night, the light can still shine through! That's what I believe.  
Mina: *sweats* You and your overly complicated sayings again. Sometimes I hate you so much!

**REBUTTAL  
Megumi's Logic, Pt 2  
**  
Megumi: [_I'll admit that you didn't shove the victim down the stairs like I claimed just now._]  
[_You probably killed her elsewhere by bludgeoning her in the head with a blunt object..._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Did you find the murder weapon?  
Megumi: Unfortunately, no. But the wound on the victim's forehead is obviously indicative of a heavy, non-pointed weapon, like a bat or in fact anything heavy.  
Edgeworth: But without a weapon, how was she killed?  
Megumi: We're still working on that.  
Edgeworth: And by any chance have you ascertained the real location of the murder?  
Megumi: We're working on that too.  
Mina: Do you detectives know ANYTHING? ! O_O+  
Megumi: *recoils* Kugh! You little...!  
Edgeworth: (Looks like you hit a raw nerve, Mina. But we're in the dark as much as he is...)  
Megumi: A-Anyway!

Megumi: [_Then you brought her body here, to Corridor W-1._]  
[_And as you a full-grown man, you easily have the strength to do so._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: What do you mean by that?  
Megumi: Transporting a dead body is very troublesome for a single person. But nonetheless, you managed to get the dirty deed done. And for that to happen, you needed to have a significant amount of strength. A woman couldn't possibly do that. And among the male suspects, you are the most well-built.  
Mina: It's good to know that you still have it, Edgey, but that's also your greatest disadvantage now...  
Edgeworth: (Talk about a double-edged sword... Oh well.)

Megumi: [_By the way, judging from the rigor mortis in the victim's body, you most likely killed her quite some time ago._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Can you tell me what you deduced from this rigor mortis?  
Megumi: As you know, rigor mortis is a stiffening of the muscles. It occurs approximately three hours after death, which would put the time of death to be around noon.  
Edgeworth: I too noticed that the muscles were quite hard, when I touched the victim's neck to check her pulse.  
Megumi: The forensics team tried to test the mobility of her limbs, and yes, they were quite immobile.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Preliminary findings  
**Initial estimations put time of death around 12 pm. Pending autopsy.]

Megumi: We wouldn't know for sure about the time of death, but the lab boys will get on it. I think my estimate is a good one, though.  
Edgeworth: That was very important. Let's hear it again, Detective.

Megumi: [_Judging from the rigor mortis, you killed the victim at around 12 pm._]

[**EVIDENCE - Visitors' logbook**]

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: *shrugs and shakes head, smiling* ...Detective Kitaniji, do you seriously think I killed Ms Konishi at that time?  
Megumi: Absolutely, positively, yes.  
Edgeworth: Then you're absolutely, positively...wrong. You obviously haven't done your homework, Detective!  
Megumi: ? !  
Edgeworth: According to the visitors' logbook, I arrived in the school premises only at 2:30 pm. How could I have killed the victim at 12 pm? !  
Megumi: *recoils* Wh- But... but! It's possible that you could have snuck into the school earlier, then killed her!

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: The outer walls of this school are very tall and topped with barbed wire. It is not possible for anyone to climb in from outside without hurting themselves.  
Megumi: O-Oh... Yes, that's right...  
Edgeworth: What's more, the school itself is positioned in a very visible part of the city. Anyone who tried to climb over the walls would be easily seen, and what murderer wants to leave witnesses?  
Megumi: *recoils* Ugh, you have a point...  
Edgeworth: And trying to sneak past the security guard at the entrance...it goes without saying that it's impossible too.  
Megumi: ...  
Edgeworth: I think I've given you enough proof to confirm my innocence! Well, Detective?  
Megumi: Pfft... Hahaha! Yes, congratulations, Mr Edgeworth. You win.  
Mina: Wow! You did it, Edgey!  
Edgeworth: *takes a bow* Never underestimate the power of truth!  
Mina: So that's how cross-examinations work! Thanks, Edgey, that was interesting! The next time someone lies to me, I'll be sure to cross-examine him! They wouldn't stand a chance!  
Edgeworth: (They might if you don't have the right evidence...)  
Megumi: Very well, you're no longer a suspect. Go on and pat yourself on the back...  
Forensics: Sir! Sorry to interrupt, but we found this in the locker area!  
Megumi: What is it?  
Forensics: This baseball bat. The head is covered with some blood, which we tested to be the victim's!  
Megumi: So this is the murder weapon!  
Edgeworth: The murder weapon? !  
Neku: H-Hey, isn't that... mine? !  
Mina: What? !  
Shiki: Huh? !  
Beat: Phones? !  
Eri: Neku...!  
Ai: Yours? !  
Kariya: Are you kidding?  
Megumi: Oh, thank you for admitting so readily, Neku Sakuraba. You made things much easier. You just confessed that this is your baseball bat, didn't you?  
Neku: Confess? W-Well, this is mine, but-  
Megumi: Then why is it smeared with the victim's blood? I'll tell you why... You used the bat to beat Ms Konishi in the head! In other words, you killed her!  
Everyone: *shocked* WHAT! ! !  
Neku: *sweats* N-No way! I'm... I'm innocent! I didn't do anything! ! !  
Megumi: Really? Then what's your story about the blood and all?  
Neku: I don't know anything about it! And I'm not lying!  
Megumi: A likely story! We'll, well bring you in for a nice long afternoon of questioning...  
Mina: Neku! Edgey, is he... is he really the culprit? !  
Edgeworth: I don't know, but-  
Megumi: Boys, take him away.  
Forensics: Yes sir!

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: Detective Kitaniji, you're being a bit too rash, arresting him just like this!  
Megumi: What, are you saying I'm wrong? The truth is as clear as day!  
Edgeworth: It's not as simple as you may think!

...

Edgeworth: (Once again, I've got this weird feeling that something is not right! I don't care what it takes but I WILL get to the bottom of this mystery!)

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	2. Chapter 2

**TURNABOUT HIGHSCHOOL, Part 2  
by BrDPirateMan  
****Genre: Crime / Mystery / Parody / Cross-over**

Upon being blindly accused by Detective Megumi Kitaniji of being the murderer, Edgeworth easily proved his innocence. However, now the prime suspect is Neku Sakuraba no thanks to a certain piece of evidence...

**March 14, 3:23 pm  
Seiko High School  
Corridor W-1  
**  
Megumi: We found this baseball bat in the locker area. It was hidden behind one of the doors. When this door opens, it goes flat against the wall. And in this space we found the bat. Covered in the blood of the victim!  
Neku: I know the bat is mine, but saying that I killed Ms Konishi... I... I really didn't do it!  
Megumi: Oh? Your fingerprints are all over it...  
Edgeworth: Of course they would. It's his bat after all. But how can you be so sure it's the murder weapon?  
Megumi: Hmph! Even the stupidest of nitwits can figure that out just looking at the evidence at hand! In any case, this bat will serve as evidence.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Baseball bat**  
Belongs to Neku Sakuraba. Head of bat is covered in the victim's blood. Neku's fingerprints are all over it. Suspected to be the murder weapon.]

Megumi: And now you will answer our questions! Were you here in the locker area earlier today?  
Neku: Well, as a matter of fact, y- I mean, no!  
Megumi: Hmph. It certainly belongs to you. Your name is even carved into the base.  
Neku: I had baseball practice yesterday afternoon! But I was so caught up in a few things afterwards that I totally forgot to take my bat back. Only when I went home did I realise I had left my bat in school, but by then it was already getting dark and I couldn't go back. I came here today with the intention of taking it back.  
Megumi: You mean you were searching for the bat in the locker area? !  
Neku: No, listen! I was never here! Okay? !

Megumi: The minds of today's youth... You're so creative you can create lies out of thin air! I don't believe you for a second!  
Neku: But...  
Sho: Neku Sakuraba! Even though you're my student, if you committed a crime like this, I could never forgive you! Admit your guilt! Inverse matrix!  
Neku: H-Hey! I'm telling the truth! I didn't do it!  
Sho: Why you little hectopascal! You would dare talk back to me? !

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Are we here to investigate or make baseless assumptions without even taking a long hard look at the facts? ! Please, calm down, everyone. And let us look through things one at a time.  
Megumi: Say what you want. However, I believe a thorough questioning is in order... for all the suspects in this case.  
Edgeworth: ?  
Megumi: As far as I am concerned, all who came to this school today are suspects. However, there are a few who stand out. Neku Sakuraba, with the bloody bat... Eri, who found the body together with Sakuraba... and Mr Koki Kariya, the security guard, who came running over when Neku told him about the body.  
Edgeworth: Neku and Eri found the victim's body together at the same time?  
Neku: Well, we were walking along Corridor W-1 when we saw the body. Eri was too shocked to do anything, so I hurried to the guardhouse... Ms Yashiro and Mr Kariya were inside, I told them, and Mr Kariya agreed to come check it out.  
Kariya: Uzuki had to stay in the guardhouse to... you know, keep watch over the school entrance. After I found Ms Konishi dead on the floor, I immediately radioed Uzuki and told her to call the police.  
Megumi: Hmmm...  
Kariya: But seriously, why lump me in as a suspect too? What a pain.  
Megumi: What you feel doesn't matter. Now it's time for me to question the suspects. Don't worry about that, though. We wouldn't take you guys to the police station just yet. We'll just have to borrow one of your classrooms for this purpose. Now then, you first, Sakuraba!  
Neku: Wh- *sigh* I didn't do it...

An empty classroom was prepared for the interrogation, and Neku was led away inside, bombarded without mercy by Detective Kitaniji. Meanwhile, Eri and Kariya waited for their turn outside, watched over by eagle-eyed policemen.

Mina: I can't believe Neku's under suspicion for murder...  
Edgeworth: That piece of evidence puts him in a very bad light... But if I listen to what he has to say, maybe I can unearth some new information.  
Mina: Just that right now, he's pretty tied up, being grilled to perfection by that bumbling detective.  
Edgeworth: Neku will have to wait. In the meantime, Mina, I think I should talk to everyone and see what they have to say. Specifically the other suspect Eri.  
Mina: What about Mr Kariya?  
Edgeworth: He just arrived on the scene. I don't think he would know anything. Eri might, though.  
Mina: Good idea. Maybe she can tell us something useful!  
Edgeworth: Let's see what Eri has to say about this.

...

Eri: Ow... My arms...  
Mina: Eri, what's wrong?  
Eri: Huh? Oh, nothing... My arms hurt because I've been doing so much spring cleaning.  
Mina: I see...  
Edgeworth: Excuse me, you're Eri, am I right?  
Eri: Y-Yes... Um, you are...  
Edgeworth: Miles Edgeworth, a prosecutor from America. If you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a few questions.  
Eri: Um, sure... G-Go ahead... But...  
Edgeworth: But what?  
Eri: Detective Kitaniji told me that I should not say anything to you...  
Edgeworth: What? ! But I'm part of the investigative team!  
Forensics: Sir! Sorry, Mr Edgeworth, sir, but you ARE still a suspect, just like the rest of your friends.  
Mina: But we're just asking questions so we can solve the case!  
Forensics: We're sorry. We're just following orders.  
Edgeworth: Rrgh...  
Mina: I can't believe this...  
Edgeworth: Looks like the only way we're going to get more information is by waiting for the suspects' testimonies.  
Eri: Sorry, looks like I can't help you...  
Mina: By the way, Eri, I've been meaning to ask you...  
Eri: Hmm? If this is about the murder, I'm sorry...  
Mina: No, Eri. That pendant... I've never seen it before. Where did you get it? It looks so cool!  
Eri: Um, th-thanks! Actually, you can't get this anywhere else...  
Mina: Huh? What'd you mean?  
Eri: The pendant's custom-made. There's no way you can buy it in a shop.  
Mina: Whoa! So it's unique? ! You have the only one? !  
Eri: Urm... y-yeah... That's right!  
Edgeworth: (Maybe I'm not into jewellery, but I don't see how a pendant that's shaped like a plus sign would look nice... And the black and pink used to colour it clash horribly!)  
Mina: So you had it made at some jewellery shop, huh?  
Eri: Well, actually, my... my boyfriend gave it to me... *blushing*  
Mina: Wow! That's awesome!  
Eri: Y-Yeah, I was waiting for him here, and he gave it to me!  
Mina: That is so cool. It must be cool to have a boyfriend! Say, Edgey, do you have any idea what it's like to fall in love?  
Edgeworth: I can't say I have, but I don't see how that has any place in our investigation.  
Mina: -_-+ *pinches Edgeworth*  
Edgeworth: *recoils* OW! What's that for, Mina? !  
Mina: Would it kill you to relax a little? ! It's just a typical conversation!  
Edgeworth: (Don't you understand the seriousness of it all? This is a murder we've got on our hands! ...Hmm? Wait a minute...) Eri, can you tell me a bit more about you waiting for your boyfriend?  
Eri: Huh?  
Mina: EDGEY! You do NOT pry into our private matters! And that includes boyfriends and stuff!  
Edgeworth: (Weren't you doing some shameless prying yourself?) In any case, Eri, you said you were waiting for your boyfriend today. What time was that?  
Eri: But... I was told not to say anything about the case...  
Edgeworth: Oh, but this question is completely unrelated.  
Eri: W-Well, y-yeah, I guess... I think it was around... uh, gee... I forget when!  
Edgeworth: ...  
Eri: I don't really remember. I mean, I don't take note of the time and things like that.  
Edgeworth: So... he gave you that pendant today?  
Eri: Y-Yes, why?  
Edgeworth: Hmmm... (Maybe it's pretty normal for girls to blush and stutter about their boyfriends, but she somehow seems uneasy talking about it. Also, how could she forget about something that happened only today? ! Oh well, I don't know where this will take me, but I'll make a note of it.)

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Eri's meeting**  
Eri's boyfriend gave her a pendant in the school compounds. Does this have any relation to anything?

Mina: Ahaha... Never mind about him, Eri... As a prosecutor, his job is to pry into people's lives, so please don't be offended.  
Edgeworth: *recoils* (What? ! That's not what a prosecutor does! ! !)  
Eri: Oh, don't worry about it... I understand that you have a job to do after all.  
Edgeworth: (*sigh* Does no one here have the slightest idea what lawyers do?)

Neku emerged from the classroom at last, his interrogation complete.

Forensics: Eri, you're up next. Please enter.  
Eri: A-Alright...  
Mina: How did it go, Neku?  
Shiki: Yeah, was it okay?  
Beat: Yo, Phones...  
Neku: They asked me all sorts of questions... all of them stupid ones... And I can't even talk about it, because I was told not to!  
Edgeworth: (Rrgh... Looks like I can't get anything out of Neku either...)  
Ai: You can't even talk about it? ! That sucks!  
Shiki: Neku, we know you're not the killer. We'll stick by you!  
Neku: Th-Thanks guys. Man, I need a breather. Seriously, I don't think that detective knows what he's doing.  
Edgeworth: The proverbial headless chicken.  
Mina: Yeah, well said, Edgey. So what do we do now?  
Edgeworth: If Neku's interrogations are anything to go by, then we'll be waiting for a long time. But just because we can't ask anything of anyone doesn't mean we can't do a bit of investigating ourselves.  
Mina: I see! We're going to search for clues in another place, huh? Well, uh, then let's start at the... canteen! Yeah, that's it!  
Edgeworth: ...You just want to see if there's anything to eat.  
Mina: Oh come on! -_-+ I'm a growing teenager! I need lots of food to keep myself healthy.  
Edgeworth: Today's Saturday. The canteen will no doubt be closed.  
Mina: *sweats* Um, y-you're right... BUT! There's still a vending machine!  
Edgeworth: (Are crisps and chocolate bars your idea of staying healthy? !)  
Mina: Oh! Darn... I've got no money...  
Edgeworth: Oh well, too bad.  
Mina: *smiles* Say, Edgey... Have I told you how handsome you've become lately? I'm sure there must be scores of girls coming after y-  
Edgeworth: Flattery is not an effective form of bribery, Mina. I'm not buying you anything until the case is over.  
Mina: No luck... *sigh* :(  
Edgeworth: Now come on, let's go... to the locker area!

**March 14, 3:45 pm  
Seiko High School  
Locker Area  
**  
Edgeworth: This is where Detective Kitaniji said his men found the baseball bat...  
Mina: ...that belongs to Neku.  
Edgeworth: There must be some more clues waiting to be found. Let's hurry before that detective suspects anything!  
Mina: But what about the policemen here? Wouldn't they tell him?  
Edgeworth: Probably. But Detective Kitaniji is busy right now... I doubt his subordinates would dare to disturb him at a time like this. Besides, they're busy themselves.  
Mina: Well, it's worth a shot. Alright! Let's get cracking!

**BEGIN INVESTIGATION  
**  
Edgeworth and Mina checked out the place where the bloody baseball bat was said to be found.

Edgeworth: So it was hidden behind this door. If someone closed it, they'd be in for a rude shock.  
Mina: Yeah, they'd see the bat propped up against the wall, dripping with blood. Edgey, did Neku really...?  
Edgeworth: I don't know, but I have a hunch that he didn't. We have to prove it though.  
Mina: Do you think we'll find any clues at all?  
Edgeworth: Hard to say... but at least we have to try. For his sake.  
Mina: Yeah. I mean, beneath his sometimes gruff attitude, he's a nice guy and everything...  
Edgeworth: I didn't know he's your romantic interest.  
Mina: Wha? N-No! He isn't! There's no way I'd like him... in that way... I-I mean, wh-why would you think that? !  
Edgeworth: (Maybe it's the blush that's creeping onto your face... or the way you stammer so embarrassingly...)  
Mina: Aargh... You don't believe me, do you?  
Edgeworth: ...There's nothing to be found here. Let's look somewhere else.

Edgeworth approached one of the forensics experts.

Edgeworth: Excuse me, are you doing a Luminol test now?  
Forensics: This is so frustrating! I've been spraying everywhere but I couldn't even get a single blotch of blood!  
Mina: O-Oh?  
Forensics: I was hoping to find a particularly striking patch of blood so I could show it off to the other guys. I mean, that would be a bloody good find, wouldn't it? Haha! Get it? Bloody?  
Mina: WH- *angry* You're sick! Sick, I tell you! Of all the things to joke about...  
Forensics: What? ! It wasn't funny? ! But my talent for comedy is well-known in the police force!  
Edgeworth: (You couldn't have picked a more inappropriate place than a crime scene to showcase your gallows humour...) Anyway, Mina, we should look elsewhere.  
Mina: Sure. I can't stand this guy one bit!  
Forensics: *sigh* No one appreciates humour around here...

Edgeworth took a quick look at the vending machine.

Edgeworth: It's a vending machine selling all kinds of soft drinks... the kind that are guaranteed to give you tooth decay. There's a promotional poster on the front... "COMING SOON! Tin Pin Slammurai VS Steel Samurai! Coming to theatres near you!"  
Mina: They're combining the best of the west and the east in an action-packed film that'll cater to all audiences!  
Edgeworth: Well, are you going to watch it, Mina?  
Mina: Of course! I'm sure you would too, 'cause you're, like, the BIGGEST STEEL SAMURAI FANBOY out there!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* WH- Not so loud! They'll hear us!  
Mina: Wh-What's wrong with that?  
Edgeworth: (I can't let anyone know that a grown-up like me is actually enjoying a children's show... Imagine the horror if they did!)

A piece of paper was sticking out of one of the lockers.

Mina: What's this?  
Edgeworth: Must be a note or letter. Somebody must have stuck it there. It's probably safe to say it's not the owner of this locker. After all, who'd want to send notes to themselves?  
Mina: *pulls out note* Hmm... Hahaha!  
Edgeworth: What's so funny about it, Mina?  
Mina: It's a love letter, Edgey! It's so corny too! Listen... "Roses are red, violets are blue... So would you please go... on a date with me?" Hey, what gives? It doesn't even rhyme.  
Edgeworth: Mina, I think you should put that back where it belongs. I'm sure if the writer of that letter would be greatly offended if he found out you were peeping at it.  
Mina: If I was the receiver of this letter, I'd reject him immediately. I mean, who comes up with a poem that's so tacky and awful? !  
Edgeworth: (Old-fashioned love poems aren't exactly effective in this day and age either...)

**INVESTIGATION COMPLETE**

Edgeworth: It doesn't look like we're going to find anything substantial here.  
Mina: But without any clues, how are we going to prove that Neku is innocent? !  
Shiki: Mina... Mr Edgeworth...  
Mina: Shiki? What's up? Something the matter?  
Shiki: I just wanna ask... Is Neku going to be okay?  
Edgeworth: Not for a good while, it would seem. (And if nothing can be done, the wrong person will be arrested!)  
Shiki: I... I see...  
Mina: *sigh* I feel bad for Neku... having to be questioned when he's really not guilty.  
Shiki: ...Hey, when did the murder take place, anyway?  
Edgeworth: According to Detective Kitaniji, it was around 12 pm.  
Shiki: At noon? That's strange...  
Mina: Shiki, what's so strange about the time?  
Shiki: Well, if you could take a look at this...  
Edgeworth: A digital camera?  
Mina: Uh... I know it's your camera, but what's the significance of it now?  
Shiki: Please look at this picture that I took today.

Shiki scrolled through the photos in her digital camera until she came to a particular one, which she showed to Edgeworth and Mina. It was a photo of Neku and Shiki together. He had one arm wrapped around her shoulder, and they were smiling broadly.

Mina: *shocked* Shiki... This is... You and Neku are...  
Shiki: *blushing* Y-Yeah, we're... going out. But our relationship is strictly low-key. We've never told anyone about it.  
Mina: *hurt* Oh... I see...  
Edgeworth: (SOMEBODY really does have a crush on the Sakuraba boy...) I see lockers to the sides... Was this photo taken in this locker area?  
Shiki: Yes, it was. And it was taken today.  
Edgeworth: Today? By Jove, the timestamp on this photograph you took... It says today's date! And what's more, it says the time too... at 12:05 pm!  
Shiki: Yeah, so... Neku couldn't be the killer right? ! 'Cause he was with me the whole time and we took a whole buncha photos too.  
Mina: You... You took how many? !  
Shiki: Um, about ten?  
Mina: *bug-eyed* Wh-Whaaaaaat? !  
Shiki: Mina, wh-what's wrong?  
Mina: *even more hurt* N-Nothing... I'm so touched that you and Neku are so close... So touched I could cry!  
Edgeworth: (From disappointment, it would seem... But this isn't the time for such matters!)

Scrolling through the pictures, Edgeworth found that the first photo was taken at 12:05 pm, with the rest taken at regular intervals all the way till 12:28 pm, when the last photo was taken.

Edgeworth: (I never like looking at photos of couples acting all lovey-dovey in front of the camera, but an important fact can be derived from this...) Shiki, you and Neku were in the locker area for 30 minutes starting from 12:05 pm. I think this set of photographs would make splendid evidence.  
Shiki: You're free to borrow my camera, but... when the case is over, please give it back to me, okay?  
Edgeworth: *takes a bow* Thank you very much. This will prove helpful.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Shiki's camera  
**Contains a set of photos that Shiki and Neku took together in the locker area. First photo - 12:05 pm, last photo - 12:28 pm.]

Just then, Detective Kitaniji and the rest of the policemen poured into the locker area, followed by the other students.

Megumi: Ah, there you are, Mr Edgeworth.  
Edgeworth: Yes, what is it, Detective?  
Megumi: Before I continue, if you must know, I got the autopsy report already. The time of death is 12 pm, like we estimated earlier.  
Edgeworth: I see...  
Megumi: Anyway, I'm done with the interrogations. Now I'm fully convinced that Neku is the killer!  
Edgeworth: What? !  
Megumi: Why don't we let the witness explain it herself?  
Mina: Who's the witness? !  
Eri: Um... It's me...  
Neku: Wait, you're saying you saw me kill Ms Konishi? !  
Megumi: Eri, tell us all about what you saw at the time of the murder.  
Eri: Y-Yes, Detective...  
Neku: Eri, you... I didn't do anything! You're lying!  
Mina: I can't believe it! Edgey, are you going to... uh... do a full-body examination on her... Wait. EEEW! Edgey, you're so disgusting! I never thought you'd plan to grope the witnesses-  
Edgey: *recoils* It's CROSS-EXAMINATION!

**TESTIMONY by Eri  
What Eri Saw  
**  
Eri: I was chilling as usual, in the locker area.  
Then I saw Ms Konishi come in, for what reason I don't know.  
Suddenly Neku appeared behind her, and raised his baseball bat to strike!  
He whacked her in the back of her head, and she... she fell...  
I was so scared that I stayed where I was behind a row of lockers. Luckily he did not see me.

Neku: Curse you, Eri! Look, I don't like Ms Konishi that much, but not so much that I'd wanna kill her!  
Megumi: But why didn't you bring this up earlier, Eri?  
Eri: I... I'm afraid Neku would do something horrible to me if I told on him.  
Neku: Hey! Watch it, man! I'm clear! I'm-  
Megumi: It'll be up to us and not you to determine your innocence.  
Neku: Ungh...  
Mina: Edgey...  
Edgeworth: (The evidence is incriminating, but Eri's testimony isn't foolproof. I'll find that contradiction as quick as lightning!)

**REBUTTAL  
What Eri Saw  
**  
Eri: [_I was chilling as usual, in the locker area._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Chilling?  
Eri: Er, yeah... As in... chilling. You know...  
Edgeworth: Please explain.  
Eri: Well, it's a Saturday and I had nothing to do, so I thought, well, maybe I'd come to school and hang out.  
Edgeworth: That sounds like a very strange hobby. This... "chilling". So I take it you were simply relaxing doing nothing useful-  
Eri: H-Hey! It's useful! I mean, as in... useful for my soul! I've been knee-deep in homework and studies for so long, that I needed a chance to take a break! So gimme a break, Mr Edgeworth! I need to chill to feed my soul!  
Edgeworth: (Soul food I can understand, but why come to a school of all places on a Saturday? The city's out there for you to explore, and it's more interesting than a school.)  
Megumi: Eri, please continue.

Eri: [_Then I saw Ms Konishi come in, for what reason I don't know._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Are you sure it was Ms Konishi whom you saw?  
Eri: Of course. I would never mistake that unique dress she wears, and her glasses, and her... um...  
Edgeworth: Her what?  
Eri: L-Let's just say that apart from her fashion sense, she also has a... um... very ample bosom.  
Edgeworth: Ample... bosom? By that you mean...  
Mina: *pinches Edgeworth* Stop asking about that, Edgey!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Wh-What did I do? !  
Mina: By asking such questions, you clearly show no respect for us women!  
Eri: Um... Th-That's right!  
Ai: Mr Edgeworth, how could you press for details like that? !  
Shiki: Have you no shame? !  
All the other girls: PERVERT!  
Edgeworth: *sweats* Gnnrk... (Something tells me I should just carry on with the testimony...)

Eri: [_Suddenly Neku appeared behind her, and raised his baseball bat to strike!_]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: When you mean suddenly, you really mean the killer took the victim by surprise, don't you?  
Eri: Th-That's right... Neku... He snuck up behind her and... I saw he was up to no good!  
Neku: YOU... LIAR!  
Eri: He had this evil angry look on his face... I was so petrified with fear, I couldn't move a muscle. I couldn't even shout to get her attention! It's all my fault that she's dead!  
Megumi: There, there. Don't blame yourself now, Eri.  
Sho: But it's zetta easy to see how Neku can be such a violent person. You can see the fire blazing in his eyes.  
Neku: Mr Minamimoto, not you too... I'm not like that...  
Sho: Sine cosine tangent! Can you prove that you're not? !  
Neku: Uggh...  
Edgeworth: (This is already beginning to sound very odd...)  
Eri: Anyway, then he...

Eri: [_He whacked her in the back of her head, and she... she fell..._]

[**EVIDENCE - Crime scene notes**]

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: Let me get this straight. You saw Neku hit Ms Konishi in the back of her head with the baseball bat...  
Eri: Y-Yes, that's right. Oh, it was so horrible...  
Edgeworth: *stern* I think what's horrible is that lie you just made up!  
Eri: L-L-Lie? ! But I'm telling the truth!  
Neku: Truth, my foot!  
Megumi: Quiet!  
Edgeworth: The head of the bat is covered in the victim's blood. Supposing she was hit from behind, why is her wound on her forehead instead? !  
Eri: *recoils* Wh-Whaaaaaa? !

**HOLD IT!**

Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, think a bit more creatively. It's entirely possible that when she was hit from behind, it caused her to fall headlong... and she bashed her own forehead in when she connected with the floor. That was how the wound on her forehead came to being.

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: We examined the body carefully. There were no traces of blood on the back of the victim's head! How is it even possible that there is blood on the bat from hitting her from behind? !  
Megumi: *recoils* Guh!  
Edgeworth: Furthermore... the forensics team already ascertained that the only injury that the victim sustained was to her forehead. There was no injury to the back of her head!  
Eri: N-N-Nooooo!  
Edgeworth: That was a blatant contradiction of the facts!  
Eri: *sweats* W-Wait! I'm... I'm really confused... Gimme a moment to think...  
Edgeworth: ?  
Eri: The whole thing was too much, and I kinda... got things mixed up... If you don't mind, may I change my testimony a little?  
Megumi: That's certainly fine. A murder being played out in front of you is not something that happens all the time. It's understandable that you'd be so shocked.  
Edgeworth: (Hmph. Let's see you try and twist the facts!)

**TESTIMONY by Eri  
What Eri Saw, Pt 2  
**  
Eri: Sorry for making such a huge blunder earlier... The truth is...  
Neku did hit Ms Konishi in the forehead with the baseball bat!  
The moment she came into the locker area, he attacked her!  
He was so brutal! He hit her once, and then she collapsed, dead!  
After that, he... he just stood over her lifeless body, bat soaked in blood.

Neku: Hey! I told you, I'm not the killer! And don't make me look so savage!  
Megumi: "Don't make me look so savage"? Are you implying your guilt as the real killer, Sakuraba? !  
Neku: N-No! Of course not!  
Edgeworth: Neku, it would do you a world of good if you could keep your mouth closed for a good while.  
Mina: *sweats* In other words, please shut up!

**REBUTTAL  
What Eri Saw, Pt 2  
**  
Eri: [_Sorry for making such a huge blunder earlier... The truth is..._]  
[_Neku did hit Ms Konishi in the forehead with the baseball bat!_]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: So are you sure this time that it was the forehead that was hit?  
Eri: Yes...  
Edgeworth: Supposing Neku is the killer, which I think he is not... If he hit the victim in the forehead, needless to say he was in front of her, correct?  
Eri: Um, that'd sound about right.  
Edgeworth: In which spot exactly was he when he attacked Ms Konishi?  
Eri: L-Let's see... I think it was... *points at the floor* ...here?  
Edgeworth: (Are you answering questions or asking them?)  
Megumi: So then, what next?

Eri: [_The moment she came into the locker area, he attacked her!_]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: I just want to confirm once more that you saw Ms Konishi enter the locker area, and then right after that, she was attacked?  
Eri: Yes…  
Edgeworth: For the sake of argument, let us suppose that Neku is the killer… For him to attack her as soon as she appeared, he must have been hiding nearby, right?  
Eri: Uh-huh…  
Edgeworth: Also, if he hit her in the forehead when she came in here, it would mean that he was hiding here in the locker area.  
Megumi: Perfectly understandable, considering that she was hit on the forehead.  
Edgeworth: So, Eri, did you manage to see where the killer was hiding?  
Eri: What? I… N-No, I didn't see anything…  
Edgeworth: But you were in the same place as the killer! How could you not have seen him?  
Eri: *sweats* P-Please… I really didn't see anything… I was hanging around the back row of lockers, and there is more than one way into and out of the locker area. Neku could have entered through one of the doorways that out of my line of sight…  
Edgeworth: (She does bring up a valid point…)  
Eri: But I can be sure of the next thing that happened! It… It was shocking!  
Edgeworth: That would be…?

Eri: [_He was so brutal! He hit her once, and then she collapsed, dead!_]

[**EVIDENCE - Crime scene notes**]

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: You are saying you saw the killer bludgeon her once with the baseball bat?  
Eri: Yes! I saw it with my own eyes!  
Edgeworth: Then I suggest you go get some glasses yourself.  
Eri: ...? ! Are you doubting me again? !  
Edgeworth: The forensics team has discovered, from the two layers of blood splatter on the victim's forehead, that she was hit TWICE, and not ONCE like you said!  
Eri: *recoils* Aaaaaah!  
Edgeworth: How do you explain that it was a one-hit attack? !  
Eri: *sweats* This... It was...  
Edgeworth: Don't dispute the facts, Eri. You're lying! We still don't know who the real killer is, but I'm willing to bet you know more about the murder than we do! What about it? !  
Eri: *sweats* Uh... Um...!  
Shiki: Eri? !  
Neku: I knew it! I knew she was telling porkers! Ha, take tha- *POW!*  
Mina: *whacks Neku in the head* Neku, can you shut up for just one moment? ! Jeez!

**HOLD IT!**

Sho: Heh heh heh... So zetta slow.  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto...?  
Sho: Heh! You hectopascal... Now, aren't we all being a bit overly conclusive here?  
Edgeworth: What are you talking about?  
Sho: Think for a moment. So you've proven that the victim was hit on the forehead twice. Big factoring deal! It still means the baseball bat was the murder weapon! I mean, can you prove that it isn't? !  
Edgeworth: (He's right. Just because I pointed out all those contradictions doesn't change the fact that the baseball bat may still have been used to hit the victim twice in the forehead. But...)  
Sho: Well? Time is quickly rounding off to zero! What's the solution to your equation? !  
Edgeworth: I... don't have any evidence yet.  
Mina: Edgey? !  
Neku: WH-WHAAAAAAAT? !  
Sho: Hahahaha! Just as I thought. You're nothing more than an irrational number in a sea of integers!  
Edgeworth: *smiles* Not so fast, Mr Minamimoto. I said I don't have any evidence YET, but will soon have some. (The investigation is banking on this... I pray that this will lead us back on the right track!)  
Sho: Spit it out already! What's on your mind? !  
Edgeworth: There is a way to see if the baseball bat is the murder weapon. And that is by checking for the blood splatter.  
Sho: Huh?  
Edgeworth: There are two layers of blood splatter on Ms Konishi's head wound, indicating she was hit twice. If the bat is what was used to kill her, there should two layers of blood splatter on it as well!  
Sho: *recoils* Ugh!  
Edgeworth: But we wouldn't know until the forensics takes a look at it.  
Megumi: Lab boys, get to work! Check the bat for a double layer of blood splatter.  
Forensics: Yes sir!

(A little later...)

Megumi: Well?  
Forensics: Sir! There is only one uniform layer of blood on the baseball bat, sir!  
Megumi: Really? !  
Sho: *sweats* Nngh!  
Eri: *sweats* ...!  
Edgeworth: *shrugs and shakes head, smiling* As I expected.  
Mina: So... So what does this all mean?  
Edgeworth: It simply means... that the baseball bat is NOT the murder weapon!  
Sho: N-No...  
Edgeworth: The single blood layer implies that the bat was deliberately smeared with the victim's blood to make it appear as if it was the murder weapon!  
Eri: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: There's also another thing. I think it should be possible to check if the victim's wound was caused by the bat, by matching the shapes of the impact areas on both the wound and the bat. And of course, they wouldn't match. Because, like I said before, the bat was NOT used to kill Ms Konishi!  
Megumi: I-I see...  
Edgeworth: And also, if she was bludgeoned to death with a bat, there would be blood droplets everywhere in the locker area. I know it looks clean, but even when wiped away, a Luminol test would uncover them. My point is, if the locker area is the real crime scene, and a Luminol test was performed, there would be the presence of blood. But of course, I think no blood would be found at all!  
Megumi: Hmmm... According to Eri's testimony, Ms Konishi was killed the moment she entered this place through the double entrance doors. Lab boys! Do a quick Luminol test around this area and check for blood droplets!  
Forensics: Yes sir!

...

Forensics: The Luminol test confirms that absolutely no blood was spilled here!  
Eri: ...!  
Sho: ...!  
Edgeworth: As I thought. There is no blood, simply because the locker area is not the crime scene! Eri, your testimony just now... was one big lie after another!  
Eri: *recoils* Aaaargh!  
Mina: Eri was lying? ! ?  
Edgeworth: Yes. Neku Sakuraba... is not the killer!  
Neku: Holy- YES! I'm off the hook! Thank you, Mr Edgewo-

**HOLD IT!**

Sho: Not so fast, you bits of garbage!  
Neku: Whuh?  
Edgeworth: What now? !  
Sho: Just because you proved that Neku didn't kill Ms Konishi here and with the bat...doesn't mean squat! He could have killed her in another way!  
Edgeworth: !  
Neku: What? !  
Sho: Heh. Let's see. Ms Konishi suffered blunt trauma to the head, correct?  
Edgeworth: Yes. And?  
Sho: And? Do you not see? ! This school has so many blunt objects lying around! Brooms, heavy books, chairs... the murder weapon could be ANY of these! SOHCAHTOA!  
Megumi: *recoils* Are you implying that to find the exact murder weapon we need to examine each and every thing in this school? ! Preposterous! ! !  
Sho: Hmph. Do I look like I care? I mean, that's the job of you factoring hectopascals after all, not mine. And one more thing. So what if the locker area is not the scene of the crime?  
Edgeworth: Huh?  
Sho: It simply means the crime scene is somewhere else!  
Megumi: Tch! Mr Edgeworth, it looks like Mr Minamimoto is right. Given the circumstances surrounding two as of yet unknown pieces of information, it is impossible to declare Neku Sakuraba innocent!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Knngh!  
Neku: *sweats* What the heck? !  
Mina: Aaargh! We were so close!  
Edgeworth: (Is there nothing I can do? ...No, calm down, Miles. Think. We know that the crime scene is not here. And I'm sure that Neku Sakuraba is not the killer. If I can show that he was in the locker area at the time of the murder, I can prove his innocence!)  
Sho: Heh heh heh... First Outer Inner Last. Mr Edgeworth, where's your logic now?  
Edgeworth: *stern gaze* (...Focus! There must be something in the evidence that I can use, because this is all I have! …Wait! That's it! That piece of evidence will help me!)  
Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, I'm afraid that if you have no further arguments to make, I'm going to have to arrest Neku Sakuraba.  
Edgeworth: As a matter of fact, I'd like to –

**HOLD IT!**

Neku: Wait! Wait wait wait!  
Megumi: Sakuraba, I'd appreciate it if you kept qu-  
Neku: I'd like to give my testimony! I... I was never in the locker area!  
Shiki: Neku? !  
Mina: Wh- Edgey, Neku is...  
Edgeworth: …Yes, he's lying. But for a completely different reason, of course.  
Neku: Please! Mr Edgeworth, wouldn't you hear me out? !  
Edgeworth: But I already have-  
Neku: PLEASE! ! !  
Edgeworth: ...  
Megumi: ...  
Mina: ...  
Megumi: *sigh* This is going to be a waste of time.  
Edgeworth: (I agree, but that's because I already have the evidence I need to show he's not the killer! But if that's how Neku wants to play it...)

**TESTIMONY by Neku Sakuraba  
Neku's Alibi  
**  
Neku: Like I said, yesterday afternoon I had baseball practice.  
I forgot to take my bat home and left it in school.  
So today I came to look for my bat.  
But I knew for sure that I didn't leave my bat in the locker area, so I didn't come here at all.

Megumi: What you said is no different from what you said just minutes ago when we found your bat.  
Neku: But it's the truth!  
Edgeworth: (...Not.)  
Mina: Neku is telling fibs himself. Wasn't he in the locker area earlier?  
Edgeworth: He was.  
Mina: But why would he lie in the first place? !  
Edgeworth: I think I know why. His testimony was pointless to begin with, so I'll end it quick and easy!

**REBUTTAL  
Neku's Alibi  
**  
Neku: [_Like I said, yesterday afternoon I had baseball practice._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Which part of the school would you usually go after practice is over?  
Neku: First, we'd go back to the storerooms in the gym to return the baseball mittens and bats and caps and stuff.  
Edgeworth: But this particular bat is yours, and not school property?  
Neku: Yeah. If you look at the base, my name is etched there.  
Megumi: Hahaha! How convenient! Now we know that you're the killer!  
Neku: I swear, I am not!  
Edgeworth: Why can't you use the bats that are provided by the school?  
Neku: I can't use those! Because my bat is... uh... it's my lucky bat! Every time I use it, I know I'll be sure of a home run! ...Well, actually, I haven't been able to do that yet, and all I can manage to get to is first base, but still! I'm confident in the power of my bat! One day it'll take me to great heights!  
Edgeworth: ...  
Mina: ...  
Megumi: ...  
Everyone: ...  
Neku: Wh-Why are you guys looking at me like I'm a fool?

Neku: [_I forgot to take my bat home and left it in school._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: What did you do yesterday that made you forget to take your bat back?  
Neku: Yesterday's match was really good, so we went all out to celebrate. Shiki, Beat and Eri were present too. We bought lots of drinks and had fun.  
Megumi: Drinks? ! You're still underage to have drinks! Don't you know it's illegal to take alcohol in Japan? !  
Neku: Wait! I don't mean-  
Megumi: No more words are necessary. Neku Sakuraba, you're under arrest for drinking AND murder!  
Neku: Hey, listen! It's just soft drinks. In fact, we bought them from this vending machine over here!  
Edgeworth: That explains why it's so empty...  
Megumi: Oh, I see. Then you're under arrest simply for mur-  
Edgeworth: I haven't finished my cross-examination yet! Hold your horses, Detective!  
Neku: We were so caught up in the happiness of our victory that I must have left the bat somewhere in school.

Neku: [_So today I came to look for my bat._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Where did you look?  
Neku: The first place I went to was the baseball field, but no luck.  
Edgeworth: When did you go to look for your bat?  
Neku: Let's see... I arrived in school today at 11:45 am.  
Mina: Yeah, that matches up with the list of attendees right here. It says Neku arrived at 11:45 am.  
Neku: I was talking to a few friends, so by the time I was in the field it was about 12:45 pm.  
Megumi: That is a one-hour gap! You were talking for so long? ! Hah! I don't believe that!  
Neku: Oh come on! Talking is something we teenagers do everyday! We get together, we chat, we strengthen our friendships!  
Mina: I can understand how Neku feels. When I go shopping for clothes with friends, I can spend as much as three hours in 104 Building.  
Megumi: *recoils* Who spends that long buying clothes? !  
Eri: Um... I do.  
Shiki: Same here.  
Ai: Sometimes I spend much longer than that.  
Megumi: Y-You're all unbelievable...  
Edgeworth: Indeed.  
Neku: Anyway, I got to the field at 12:45 pm.  
Edgeworth: (His testimony is riddled with both truths and lies. But I think I have a good idea which is which!)  
Neku: But when I went to look, my bat was nowhere to be found.

Neku: [_But I knew for sure that I didn't leave my bat in the locker area, so I didn't come here at all._]

[**EVIDENCE - Shiki's camera**]

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: Can you take a look at this?  
Megumi: My, that camera is... very pink.  
Sho: Mr Edgeworth the metrosexual, huh? Heh! Zetta cute.  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Th-This isn't my camera! It's Shiki's. And inside it is a set of about ten photos that will prove beyond a doubt that Neku is not the killer!  
Megumi: What?  
Edgeworth: Take a look at these for yourself, will you?  
Neku: Wha... You don't mean...! ! !  
Edgeworth: What's wrong, Neku?  
Neku: NO! STOP! DON'T SHOW THEM TO ANYONE!  
Megumi: ?  
Neku: *sweats* Um, those pictures... If you're thinking what I'm thinking... please! Don't show them off! I'm begging you!  
Megumi: Ho ho ho. That means there must be some very incriminating evidence in that camera! Mr Edgeworth, let me take a look!  
Edgeworth: Be my guest.  
Neku: Are you high? ! No wait! Doooooon't! ! !  
Sho: Hahahaha! Neku, you're so zetta slow! You're doomed, kid. Doomed to an infinity in jail! SOHCAHTOA!

...

Megumi: Wh-What's this? !  
Sho: Heh. I knew it.  
Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, what is the meaning of showing me a bunch of pictures of Neku posing with Shiki in the locker area?  
Sho: What? !  
Neku: Nooo! ! !  
Beat: What the heck, yo?  
Ai: Neku and...Shiki?  
Shiki: *blushing* ...  
Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, this is no time for your jokes! And if you really want my honest opinion, your jokes are in poor taste!  
Edgeworth: *smiles* I'm not joking at all. Look at the timestamps on each of those pictures.  
Megumi: ...The first photo was taken at 12:05 pm... and the last one at 12:28 pm.  
Sho: *recoils* Huh? !  
Edgeworth: Those pictures were taken in the locker area, for about a good half hour. They were taken at regular intervals during these 30 minutes, meaning that Neku was busy doing something else other than committing a murder!  
Megumi: Oh...!  
Neku: Nnnnrgh!  
Edgeworth: Remember that the murder took place at 12 pm. If Neku really did do it, he wouldn't be here in these photos! No, he wouldn't be taking snapshots of himself and Shiki in the first place!  
Mina: That's right!  
Megumi: I get it now...  
Eri: But... But...!  
Megumi: Silence! I am now convinced that you've been lying, Eri!  
Eri: *sweats* B-But the first photo says it was taken at 12:05 pm! Couldn't it be possible that Neku killed Ms Konishi during the five minutes between 12 and 12:05 pm?  
Edgeworth: Do you think a murder is so easily carried out and covered up in the space of five minutes?  
Eri: *recoils* Uuuaaargh!  
Mina: Alright! We did it, Edgey! I'm sure Neku will be so relieved!  
Neku: *clutching head in agony* Ngh... Why... Why...  
Everyone: *sweats* ...  
Mina: Neku? ! You should be happy! After all the trouble we went to just to prove your innocence, this is how you thank us? !  
Neku: I'm happy that I'm no longer a suspect, but... now, everyone knows about my relationship with Shiki! ! !  
Edgeworth: This is why I said Neku was lying for a different reason. He lied about not being in the locker area because he didn't want to face the embarrassment of everyone knowing that he had a date with Shiki here.  
Neku: Mr Edgeworth!  
Shiki: Neku...  
Neku: Why did you do it, Shiki? ! You know we can't tell anyone about it! They'll just make fun of us to no end!  
Shiki: But...  
Neku: Aargh... We'll never have a peaceful life from now on...  
Edgeworth: Neku, I don't understand your logic.  
Neku: Huh?  
Edgeworth: Shiki lent us her camera, laden with evidence, to help clear your name. Instead of whining pathetically, you should be thanking her!  
Neku: But... I...  
Edgeworth: *stern gaze*  
Neku: You're right, Mr Edgeworth. Shiki, I'm... sorry. And... thanks.  
Shiki: Neku...  
Neku: I kept on ranting and raving about the photos because I wanted our relationship to be  
kept secret... If people found out about us, there'd be no end to the teasing!  
Beat: What teasing, yo?  
Ai: What's wrong with having a relationship?  
Mina: *sweats* Must you be so secretive? ! Keeping secrets is really tiring, you know.  
Neku: Huh?  
Shiki: Neku, at first I was scared too, that our friends would make fun of us all the time, but after a while I realised how silly it was to think like that.  
Neku: R-Really?  
Shiki: I actually wanted to talk to you today about telling everyone about us, because like Mina said, it really is pointless to be so evasive about it. Can't we be a normal couple like everyone else?  
Neku: I...  
Mina: *grins* Besides, teasing is for little kids. Do you seriously think we'd stoop that low?  
Neku: ...Shiki, I'm sorry. I didn't know. I thought what I was doing was for our own good. Little did I know this is really how you think.  
Shiki: *smiles* Well, now you know.  
Mina: Awww, isn't it nice how things work out, Edgey? But... I can't help but feel a bit sad...  
Edgeworth: (Looks like Mina still can't get over her crush.)  
Megumi: Hahaha. It looks like we've been terribly mistaken. Neku Sakuraba, you're innocent after all.

**HOLD IT!**

Sho: Heh heh heh.  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto? Do you have something to say?  
Sho: Zetta.  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Don't just say something like that and expect us to understand!  
Sho: So what if these photos show that they were taken from 12 pm onwards? Shiki, it's oh-so-zetta-easy to change the time on your camera, so that the timestamps of your photos would be different too!  
Shiki: What? ! I would never...!  
Edgeworth: !  
Mina: Uh-oh!  
Sho: In other words, you and Neku could have been collaborating to fabricate this evidence!  
Shiki: But...! I didn't do anything! For real!  
Sho: Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally... But can you prove it? Prove that these pictures were really taken between 12 and 12:30 pm? !  
Shiki: The timestamp... It's real!  
Neku: We really were taking photos of ourselves here!  
Sho: Obviously, you hectopascals... have no sense of perfection, beauty and intelligence! Slabs of Ham, Celery and Horseradish, Tons of Asparagus. That is the formula of success. I've been teaching you that for so zetta long, and it still can't get in your junk-filled heads!  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto, you will refrain from personal attacks on the witnesses! (Grrr! I almost nailed it!)  
Mina: Oh no, Edgey, what now? Even the photos couldn't prove a thing!  
Edgeworth: (No... There must be something! Something in these photos... But what? I must take a closer look... and fast! What is the thing inside these photos that will prove his innocence?)

In all the photos, Neku and Shiki were standing in the locker area, with the entrance of the school directly behind them some distance away. Through the entrance gate, several buildings could be clearly seen. There was a particularly tall building with a large LCD screen...

Edgeworth: (That's it! I've found it!) These photos are genuine, and I have proof!  
Sho: Ha! Infinity has no boundaries. Now tell us! What is it?  
Edgeworth: The photos are the real deal. And the thing that proves it is this!

Edgeworth pointed to the tall building with the LCD screen.

**TAKE THAT!**

Edgeworth: Do you see this building in the background?  
Sho: Huh! I can see it alright. It's your weak, crumbling logic that I can't see! Hahahaha SOHCAHTOA!  
Edgeworth: Then it's time for you to eat crow. The LCD screen on this building tells the time! And it says 12:05 pm in the first picture!  
Megumi: Indeed! The time shown on the screen matches up with the timestamp on all of these photos!  
Sho: *sweats* Gwuh? !  
Edgeworth: *shrugs and shakes head, smiling* So now are you going to say that Shiki fabricated the time on one of Shibuya's most famous buildings, Mr Minamimoto?  
Sho: Ungh!  
Edgeworth: This boils down to the photos are real and the timestamps are correct! And it also means that Neku is not the murderer!  
Sho: Gwooooh! ! !

...

Megumi: Sound logic, Mr Edgeworth. I applaud you.  
Edgeworth: Unfortunately, the case isn't over yet. After all, we're missing two things. First, there is currently still no murder weapon...

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Missing murder weapon  
**The murder weapon is nowhere to be found. What exactly was used to kill Ms Konishi?

Edgeworth: ...and we don't know where the murder took place. And of course, there's the pressing matter of figuring out whodunnit.  
Megumi: Without any real leads, we'll have to search the entire school for clues.  
Edgeworth: I'm afraid that would be the best course of action now.  
Megumi: We'll get right to it. No matter what the risks, we'll do what's needed to ensure that justice is served! That is the mindset of the Japanese Police!  
Mina: Wow, for a moment Detective Kitaniji actually looked intelligent.  
Megumi: Right. Arrest this girl at once.  
Eri: Aah! W-Wait!

**HOLD IT!**

Sho: You...  
Edgeworth: !  
Sho: Are you saying Eri is the murderer?  
Megumi: No, but she falsified her testimony. She's being placed under arrest for disruption of justice.  
Sho: Grrr... She's innocent, I tell you. She's innocent!  
Kariya: H-Hey, why are you so angry, man? Maybe I'm just a security guard round here, but-  
Sho: You, shut your mouth! She wouldn't... She wouldn't...  
Megumi: Is it not clear enough that what Eri did was unlawful?  
Sho: Rrrgh!  
Edgeworth: *stern gaze* ...Sho Minamimoto.  
Sho: What? !  
Edgeworth: You're acting really odd for someone who's not a prime suspect.  
Sho: ...?  
Edgeworth: You seem rather... urgently enthusiastic about defending Eri. It's as though you don't want her to land herself into trouble.  
Sho: Heh, she's my student. I care about all my students!  
Edgeworth: You didn't feel the same way about Neku Sakuraba earlier.

(Flashback to earlier.)

Sho: Neku Sakuraba! Even though you're my student, if you committed a crime like this, I could never forgive you! Admit your guilt! Inverse matrix!  
Neku: H-Hey! I'm telling the truth! I didn't do it!  
Sho: Why you little hectopascal! You would dare talk back to me? !

...

Edgeworth: Up until now, you've wanted to put all the blame on Neku. Yet Eri has clearly lied in her testimony, and you still want to divert suspicion away from her.  
Sho: ...  
Eri: ...  
Edgeworth: That... I find very peculiar! Are you hiding something, Mr Minamimoto? !  
Megumi: Enough, Mr Edgeworth. Maybe you have your reasons for suspecting Mr Minamimoto, but our investigation is still going on, and unfortunately very little progress has been made. We still have plenty of work to do.  
Mina: Edgey...  
Edgeworth: ...My apologies. I got... carried away.  
Sho: Hmph. Whatever.  
Edgeworth: ...  
Megumi: We are now going to have to examine every part of the school! Alright, everyone! I'm splitting you into groups. Do a thorough check on everything. Fingerprints, Luminol, the works. Team A, janitor's closet. Go.  
Forensics: Yes, sir!  
Megumi: Team B, staff room. Team C, washrooms. Team D...

And so, everyone went on their separate ways. Eri was arrested and taken away. The interrogations continued, leaving Edgeworth and Mina to ponder over the latest sequence of  
events.

Edgeworth: *sigh*  
Mina: Edgey, I've never seen you this... angry before. You gonna be alright?  
Edgeworth: *chuckle* Never mind about me. It's my fault that my emotions got the better of me. But still... That Minamimoto guy... comes across as very suspicious to me.  
Mina: Between you and me, after hearing what you just said, and how crazy he sounded just now, I have my doubts about him too. Maybe he's the one responsible for this whole mess!  
Edgeworth: We wouldn't know yet. Not until we get our hands on some solid evidence. At least we know that Neku's bat isn't the murder weapon now...

[**Baseball bat** no longer needed as evidence.]

Mina: What about Eri? You don't seriously think she's...  
Edgeworth: Whether she's the murderer or not remains to be seen. But one thing's for sure. She's tied to this case in a major way. And Mr Minamimoto may have something to do with it too!  
Mina: Yeah... So where to now?  
Edgeworth: Let's head straight for the lion's den... Mr Minamimoto's cubicle specifically. To the staff room we go!  
Mina: Alright, let's find some real evidence this time!

...

Edgeworth: (I suspect that Eri and Sho Minamimoto may be collaborating with each other. What's their story? I need to find out soon...)

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


	3. Chapter 3

**TURNABOUT HIGHSCHOOL, Part 3  
by BrDPirateMan  
****Genre: Crime / Mystery / Parody / Cross-over  
**

Eri claimed she saw Neku commit the foul deed of murdering Ms Konishi. However, Edgeworth managed to expose her lies. Despite his efforts, the real killer remained a mystery. With no real leads, everyone is back to square one...

**March 14, 4:16 pm  
Seiko High School  
Staff Room  
**  
Edgeworth: Team B is busy dusting around for fingerprints... Maybe they'll get to Luminol later...  
Mina: *ACHOO!* The powder they're using is flying everywhere! It's really, ah- *ACHOO!*  
Edgeworth: Yes... Mina, mind that you don't sneeze on anything. Everything in this staff room must be preserved carefully. You don't want to spoil any potential evidence.  
Mina: That's so- *ACHOO!* -easy for you to- *ACHOO!* -say! How about I blow my nose on your adult-sized bib? !  
Edgeworth: *recoils* It's a cravat! And no, you are NOT using any of my clothes to sate your runny nose!  
Mina: Cravat, shmavat, it's a bib. *evil grin* It's a little something you use to catch food scraps as you eat so they don't stain your shirt. Hee hee, Edgey, you're such a big baby!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Mina! This is- *sigh* Never mind. Let us be quick about our investigation.  
Forensics: Sir! Mr Edgeworth, sir!  
Edgeworth: Hmm?  
Forensics: We found this on Eri after we arrested her, sir! Detective Kitaniji trusts you enough to take a look at it!  
Mina: Eri's cell phone?  
Edgeworth: Have you looked at its contents yet?  
Forensics: Not yet, sir. Everyone is so busy, that we simply don't have time. Detective Kitaniji said that since you were able to show that Eri was lying in her testimony, he figured that maybe this will help you!  
Edgeworth: Um...thanks.  
Mina: But what can we find from something like this? It's just a normal-looking cell phone...  
Edgeworth: ...with lots of abnormal-looking straps and knick-knacks hanging from it.  
Mina: Did that detective say to look through its contents? But... I don't feel comfortable prying into people's private stuff... Huh? Wow! Eri takes pictures of all the clothes she designs, and keeps them in her phone? Cool! And hey, there are more pictures of her at a... slumber party? ? ? I bet she bought that bra from "Lacy Temptations"! Haha! Let's see what else she has!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* (So much for respect for others' privacy... and just exactly WHAT kind of photos does Eri take of herself anyway? !)  
Mina: Ooh... Let's take a quick peek at her inbox. I'm sure she has some... delicious secrets.  
Edgeworth: You know, we can look at it later. We still have an investi-  
Mina: Wh-What's this? Edgey, look at this message that was received today. It's from... "Hubby"?  
Edgeworth: "Hubby"? Is that a euphemism for... her boyfriend's name?  
Mina: "My dear Eri, are you free today? I want to see you; I'm so lonely. :( My place. I'll be in my cubicle all the way from 11 am to 1 pm. Don't worry it's Saturday, there's no one in the staff room. See you there." That's what it says. But who is "Hubby"?

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - "Hubby"  
**Eri has been corresponding via text message with someone whom she calls "Hubby".

Edgeworth: Interesting... Whoever wrote this specifically mentioned the staff room as the meeting place.  
Mina: You mean this staff room?  
Edgeworth: Most probably. Eri is a student of this school. So the only staff room I can think of that she'll go to is this one.  
Mina: Do you think "Hubby" is a student here?  
Edgeworth: No. The message said, "I'll be in my cubicle." This implies that the sender is a teacher. After all, the only place where you can find cubicles is the staff room.  
Mina: A teacher?  
Edgeworth: Shocking, but yes, it's a teacher.  
Mina: But don't you think by cubicle, "Hubby" meant... a toilet cubicle? That'll be pretty disgusting for a meeting spot, but it's perfectly plausible, right?  
Edgeworth: No again. Have you forgotten? The sender wrote that "there's no one in the staff room." Meaning that he was referring to a staff room cubicle.  
Mina: Oh yeah! Edgey, you're so sharp!  
Edgeworth: But we have no idea who this "Hubby" is, or whether his message has any significance to this case whatsoever. However, any evidence is welcome.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Eri's cell phone. **  
Contains a message from "Hubby", which reads: "My dear Eri, are you free today? I want to see you; I'm so lonely. :( My place. I'll be in my cubicle all the way from 11 am to 1 pm. Don't worry it's Saturday, there's no one in the staff room. See you there."]

Edgeworth: Now, shall we begin?

**BEGIN INVESTIGATION**

Edgeworth: Let's take a look around Mr Minamimoto's cubicle. I'm sure there must be something we can use as ammo against him.  
Mina: I've only been in here a few times.  
Edgeworth: Is that so?  
Mina: Yup. Seeing all these... I don't know, junk sculptures... Did he make these himself? ! I know he's got this penchant for arts and crafts, but... a model T-Rex made entirely from scrap metal and screws... Bleh, tacky.  
Edgeworth: Y-Yes, they do look terrible... Unique, but terrible. They have a certain... je ne sais quoi about them. Th-That might be the best way to describe them.

On a shelf were some books, all mathematical, of course.

Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto likes mathematics a lot, doesn't he?  
Mina: Oh, he doesn't just like math, he eats math, he breathes math... he practically lives in it.  
Edgeworth: These books on his shelf all look terribly complex to me. "Integration and Differentiation Explained"... "Loci and Beyond"... "Infinity 101"... Wh-What's this? "A Number to Remember"...  
Mina: Hey! Lemme see that! That looks like a romance novel! Haha! So Mr Minamimoto reads these things in his spare time!... Huh? It's just a biography of a mathematician...  
Edgeworth: What would you expect from a man who uses the word "zetta" as an adverb?  
Mina: *sigh* Figures...

An opened box caught Mina's eye.

Mina: I wonder what Mr Minamimoto keeps in here. WHOA! These are... pins? !  
Edgeworth: Looks like our resident math freak has an interest in not just math and trash, but also pin badges...  
Mina: I didn't know Mr Minamimoto plays Tin Pin! Holy! These are limited edition pins! Lucky Star... Lady Luck... Red Skull... These are the ones that all those Tin Pin enthusiasts are talking about!  
Edgeworth: Tin Pin... I take that it's that new game that's sweeping across the nation like wildfire?  
Mina: Yeah. I'm playing it too! One day, I'll become so good, that I can participate in the Tin Pin Grand Slam-Off! But... All the pins I've been using so far are pretty underpowered, so... Ah! I know!  
Edgeworth: What is it?  
Mina: Edgey! Playing Tin Pin in school is a crime! We... We have to confiscate his pins!  
Edgeworth: You just want them for yourself.  
Mina: *sweats* N-No! I swear! This... This is a direct breach of the school's rules! Let me just take them away and...  
Edgeworth: *stern* Mina! Hands off! Regardless of whether he broke the rules or not, this place is still under investigation. Don't touch anything!  
Mina: *grumble grumble* Killjoy. *grumble grumble*

Mina eyed the wastepaper basket with some interest.

Edgeworth: It's Sho's dustbin. Just some shreds of paper and crumpled notes, I guess...  
Mina: Wh-What's this shiny thing inside?  
Edgeworth: What?  
Mina: Ow! My finger!  
Edgeworth: What's wrong, Mina?  
Mina: I cut my finger! Rrgh... It hurts!  
Edgeworth: Be more careful next time you look through people's trash- Wait. You cut your finger?  
Mina: Isn't it obvious? !  
Edgeworth: There must be something in this bin that is sharp... But what could such an object be doing in here? Let me see...

Edgeworth removed the excess trash carefully...

Edgeworth: What's this? Glass shards?  
Mina: They're broken and in pieces. What're they doing here? Edgey, do you think this might be important?  
Edgeworth: Mina, every clue, no matter how small, is important.  
Mina: You handle it. I'm not cutting my fingers to shreds.  
Edgeworth: (Well, thanks for being so helpful.) Hmmm... These shards look thinner than usual. They don't look like the type of glass that is used for showcases or cabinets.  
Mina: And the shards are quite small too.  
Edgeworth: It's just an educated guess, but I believe this glass looks like it comes from a pair of spectacles.

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Glass shards in office**  
Some thin glass fragments were found in Mr Minamimoto's office. I think they're part of a pair of glasses, but whose?

Edgeworth: (Hmmm? Somehow, I feel there's a connection to be found. Let's see...)

**LOGIC CONNECTION:**

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Victim's glasses already broken?  
**We couldn't find all the shards to fully reconstruct the victim's glasses. Where are those shards?

AND

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Glass shards in office  
**Some thin glass fragments were found in Mr Minamimoto's office. I think they're part of a pair of glasses, but whose?

Edgeworth: Like we said earlier, these pieces of glass are thinner than usual. Now what is its true nature?  
Mina: I don't think it came from a window, because I don't see any broken windows.  
Edgeworth: Plus, window glass is much thicker. But when you think about it... Ms Konishi's glasses were devoid of any glass.  
Mina: So you're saying that the shards here come from her glasses?  
Edgeworth: I think so.  
Mina: Well, we wouldn't know until we start piecing 'em together! Let's get cracking! Um... But, you do it, Edgey. I don't like handling broken glass.  
Edgeworth: Mmph... Right. Let's solve this jigsaw once and for all, shall we?

...

Mina: You're right, Edgey! They do form a pair of lenses!  
Edgeworth: These are about the same size as the frame of Ms Konishi's glasses. I think it's obvious where they came from.

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Glass shards**  
Thin pieces of glass found in the dustbin in Mr Minamimoto's staff room cubicle. They fit perfectly into the frame of Ms Konishi's broken glasses.]

Edgeworth: We've stumbled upon a very important piece of evidence.  
Mina: Yeah... That's one more nail for the killer's coffin!

On the floor Edgeworth noticed a set of small circles arranged in a big rectangle, one circle at each corner. Two of the circles were close to the wall, while the other two were about two feet away.

Edgeworth: Hmmm... Look at this, Mina. Notice anything?  
Mina: The circles are almost the same colour as the floor, only slightly darker. Your point being?  
Edgeworth: Something used to stand in this spot, in the middle of the circles. A cabinet, for example, would be a good guess.  
Mina: Um... I don't get it...  
Edgeworth: A cabinet or set of portable drawers stands on four feet, right? The feet used to stand on these very circles. Over time, dust settled on the floor surrounding them. Which is why they are darker in colour than the rest of the floor!  
Mina: I see. So whatever was here before... has been moved to another spot!  
Edgeworth: Precisely.  
Mina: Come to think of it, there used to be a cabinet right here. And it's... that one!

Mina pointed at a tall cabinet which was standing beside the door. Upon inspecting the legs, Edgeworth discovered that they were indeed circular.

Edgeworth: None of the other cabinets have circular feet. This has to be the one that was moved. Now this raises a question: why was it moved?  
Mina: And maybe more alarming is the fact that so many Post-Its are stuck to it everywhere, and they all have math formulas written on them!  
Sho: Why not? It's my cabinet after all.  
Mina: Eeek!  
Edgeworth: ? ! Oh, it's you, Mr Minamimoto.  
Sho: I calculated that there would be two rats sniffing about in my place. I know you're part of the investigative team... somewhat... but, touching the possessions of a genius without his permission...is blasphemy! Blasphemy on the laws of mathematics and the universe! ! !  
Mina: Keee! We're sorry! W-We didn't mean any harm!  
Sho: This wouldn't bode well for you, dear Mina. Heh, curiosity killed the hectopascal, as they say.  
Edgeworth: (Hecto...what?) Mr Minamimoto, I'd like to apologise for my earlier outburst.  
Sho: Eh, it's cool. Geniuses like me aren't the least disturbed by zetta trifling little accusations.  
Edgeworth: ...  
Mina: Mr Minamimoto, wh-what are you doing here?  
Sho: No zetta reason. Well, maybe I'm just curious to see what these factoring 000's are doing.  
Edgeworth: You mean the forensics team.  
Sho: Yeah, either way they ain't worth all the numbers in pi.  
Edgeworth: *stern* They're helping to solve the mystery behind this murder! Don't say they're worth nothing!  
Mina: Edgey!  
Edgeworth: Mmph... Sorry, I got carried away again...  
Sho: Heh.  
Edgeworth: (This is going to be a long shot, but...) Is there anything you can share with us about this case?  
Sho: And why should I tell you? Isn't this case all about zetta top-secret stuff?  
Edgeworth: But you're not a prime suspect. If you don't mind, maybe you could fill us in on any important bits of information?  
Sho: Alright, alright... I'm a nice guy, so...listen. Some Old Horses Can Always Hear Their Owners Approach.  
Edgeworth: What?  
Sho: If you need to solve a trigonometry question, always heed those nine words. Of course, if you really must, you can always say... Sine Opposite Hypotenuse, Cosine Adjacent Hypo-  
Edgeworth: Which boils down to you have nothing to say to us.  
Mina: Mr Minamimoto! Y-You can tell me! I'm your favourite student, right? ! *wink*  
Sho: Your flirtatious tactics have zero effectiveness on me.  
Mina: Aww...  
Sho: Besides, I already have someone in my life.  
Mina: Really? ! You have a girlfriend?  
Sho: Heh. You could say that...  
Mina: Wh-Who is she? ! Tell me! Please? ? ?  
Edgeworth: Um... Mina, you're being too intrusive on his private matters...  
Sho: Sorry, can't tell you. *tosses pen up and down in his hand* The equation of my secret romance will never be simultaneous with that of your unending curiosity.  
Mina: Aww... again.  
Edgeworth: (This guy is stalling our progress. And he probably suspects we're on to something. I have to be ultra-careful with this lion of a math teacher. One mistake and he'll gobble us up!)  
Sho: Whoops! *drops pen* Ugh. Need to work on my dexterity... *stoops down to pick up pen*  
Edgeworth: (...? !)  
Sho: Anyway, where were we? Oh yeah, you better not be snooping around the test papers that I've marked, Mina, or you'll get a zetta zero... not that it matters. The marks for last Tuesday's pop quiz have already been finalised...  
Mina: *worried* Huh? Wh-What's that last statement supposed to mean?  
Edgeworth: (Mina is failing math, huh...)  
Forensics: Sir! Mr Sho Minamimoto! You're wanted downstairs! Detective Kitaniji would like to have a word with you!  
Sho: Huh? Hmph, alright, alright, wait for me. Psh... Hectopascals. Well, looks like our conversation will have to end here. Later, 000s.

Sho left the staff room to see Detective Kitaniji.

Mina: Whew! I can never get used to the guy.  
Edgeworth: I don't think anyone can.  
Mina: Seriously, why does he have to be so difficult? ! He's not much older than us, you know!  
Edgeworth: Really? He does strike me as rather young.  
Mina: He's 19 years old.  
Edgeworth: *recoils* 19? ! He's not even twenty, and he's already a math teacher? ! I guess geniuses pop up in the strangest of places...  
Mina: Yeah...  
Edgeworth: (Incredible! Hmmm, come to think of it, I know of another prodigy of the exact same age as him. Yes... A certain whip-wielding prosecutor who likes to go ballistic with her whip. *shudder*)  
Mina: Edgey? Did you shudder just now?  
Edgeworth: Um, n-no, you're mistaken. By the way... Mr Minamimoto was wearing a pendant similar to Eri's.

Mina: Huh? Oh, that's right. I didn't notice it until he bent down to pick up his pen.  
Edgeworth: A plus sign-shaped pendant... Black and pink. There's no mistaking that it's the exact same one as Eri's.  
Mina: Wow, Edgey, I didn't know you're a jewellery expert! Maybe I should take you along on our shopping trips!  
Edgeworth: Th-That would be unnecessary! (If Eri's pendant was unique like she claimed, then why is Mr Minamimoto wearing one like hers too?

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Two unique pendants?**  
Why does Sho Minamimoto wear the same "unique" pendant as Eri's?

Edgeworth: (Hmmm... Interesting.)  
Mina: Maybe it's time to move onto something else...  
Edgeworth: Wait. I want to figure out something about Eri first.  
Mina: Wh-What's there to figure out? Oh! I know... You like her, don't you?  
Edgeworth: N-No, why would I-  
Mina: Ah, but it's so hard to fight the temptations of such a beautiful girl... One day, I'm going to be just like her... And then maybe I wouldn't be so luckless in love... *sigh*  
Edgeworth: (Why must half of the conversations we have always end up going in a different direction?)

**LOGIC CONNECTION:**

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Eri's meeting**  
Eri's boyfriend gave her a pendant in the school compounds. Does this have any relation to anything?

AND

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Two unique pendants?  
**Why does Sho Minamimoto wear the same "unique" pendant as Eri's?

Edgeworth: Eri and Mr Minamimoto are wearing identical pendants. The question is why.  
Mina: *sweats* Edgey, didn't you say earlier that the investigation is the most important thing to tackle now? I don't see how this has any importance at all.  
Edgeworth: Oh, but it does. Mina, think back to what Eri said.

"Eri: The pendant's custom-made. There's no way you can buy it in a shop!"

Edgeworth: If the pendant she's wearing is unique like she claims, then how is it that Mr Minamimoto has the same pendant design as hers?  
Mina: Hmm, you're right, Edgey. But wouldn't it make sense that Mr Minamimoto liked Eri's pendant so much, that he went and made one for himself as well?  
Edgeworth: No. Eri said she received her pendant only today. For Mr Minamimoto to make a copy for himself, he would first need to see how her pendant looks like. Then he would need to go to the jewellery shop to have HIS pendant custom-made to look like Eri's. The construction of his pendant is not something that can be done in the space of a single day. *wags finger* And yet, Mr Minamimoto is wearing such a pendant today.  
Mina: Ohhh! I see! But... what does it mean?  
Edgeworth: It simply means a pair of pendants was created specially for Eri and Mr Minamimoto.  
Mina: A pair?  
Edgeworth: Yes. Eri and Mr Minamimoto... know each other very well. It was probably Mr Minamimoto who had the pendants made. Then he gave one to Eri.  
Mina: Big deal, teachers can be friends too.  
Edgeworth: Maybe it's not that simple... But seeing as they are quite close to each other, that makes Eri's part in this whole matter all the more important. I suspect that both of them may have something to do with this murder!

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Matching pendants  
**A pair of pendants. Eri is wearing one, while Sho Minamimoto is wearing the other.]

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Possible relationship?**  
How are Eri and Sho Minamimoto connected to each other?

Edgeworth: I think we have enough information to truly understand what is going on with Eri and Sho Minamimoto!

**LOGIC CONNECTION:**

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - "Hubby"**  
Eri has been corresponding via text message with someone whom she calls "Hubby".

AND

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Possible relationship?  
**How are Eri and Sho Minamimoto connected to each other?

Edgeworth: Mina, wouldn't you agree with me that the person called "Hubby" who wrote the message on Eri's phone... is her boyfriend?  
Mina: Yeah. Anyone who writes in such a lovey-dovey way certifies as a lover.  
Edgeworth: The details in that text message suggest that the person she was going to meet today right here is her boyfriend. We have also determined that this person is a teacher. But the only male teacher in school today is Mr Minamimoto.  
Mina: So then... um... WHAT THE? ! Edgey... You can't be serious!  
Edgeworth: *taps the side of his head, smiling* Oh, but I am. I think you should be able to figure it out by now, Mina.  
Mina: Are you saying that Eri's boyfriend is... Mr Minamimoto? ! ? !  
Edgeworth: Correct.  
Mina: Th-That's impossible...!  
Edgeworth: Do you remember what Eri said earlier when you asked her about her pendant?

"Mina: So you had it made at some jewellery shop, huh?  
Eri: Well, actually, my... my boyfriend gave it to me..."

Edgeworth: *smiles* It's embarrassing but fairly common practice for a couple to wear the same clothing or use the same things... all to prove to the world that they're going out and very much in love with each other.  
Mina: Oh, you mean like how a guy and a girl would wear the same type of T-shirt in public?  
Edgeworth: That's right. Eri was proud to show off her pendant, but if Mr Minamimoto did the same, it wouldn't be exactly good for them both.  
Mina: What do you mean?  
Edgeworth: He is a teacher. She is a student. If you saw them wearing the same thing - never mind if it's a pendant or a shirt - what would be the first thing that comes to mind?  
Mina: Um, that they're dating? But I don't think it's allowed in this school...  
Edgeworth: That's right, Mina. That's the answer!  
Mina: Huh?  
Edgeworth: Granted, teacher-student relationships are becoming more and more acceptable in today's society, but Japanese schools are known to be very strict. Such relationships are considered taboo and are not condoned; if found out, they can face disciplinary action.  
Mina: I see! Yeah, I don't think the higher-ups in Seiko High would like it if they found out one of their teachers is going out with a student.  
Edgeworth: That was a rather roundabout way of proving that Eri and Mr Minamimoto are going out. I also suspect that the two of them are involved in the cover-up of this murder.  
Mina: Really?  
Edgeworth: Have you noticed how much he tried to defend Eri just before she was arrested? That only serves to reiterate the fact that they're collaborators in the same crime. Which makes Mr Minamimoto our prime suspect!  
Mina: Hmmm, but we still don't have enough evidence to show he's the culprit...  
Edgeworth: I know, so let's go back to where we were. Now that he's gone, let's do what we can.

Edgeworth and Mina turned their attention to Sho's huge filing cabinet.

Mina: So, about this filing cabinet...  
Edgeworth: Yes, the question is: why was it moved from its original position?  
Mina: Hey, how about if we move it?  
Edgeworth: I don't think the policemen here would like it if we did that without their permission.  
Mina: Heh heh... Leave it to me!  
Forensics 1: La la la... Mary had some fingerprints, fingerprints, fingerprints... Mary had some fingerprints, and she went straight to jail...  
Forensics 2: That is the worst song I've ever heard, man.  
Forensics 1: Oh come on, can't I entertain myself a little? Fingerprinting is hard work!  
Mina: Um, hey, guys... *wink*  
Forensics 1 and 2: Yes, sir! What is it, sir?  
Mina: WH- *angry* I'm not a guy! If you want to address me, you'll call me-  
Forensics 1: "Ma'am"?  
Mina: NO! "Your Highness"!  
Forensics 2: Uh, yes, sir!  
Mina: No! It's- Ah, never mind. -_-+  
Edgeworth: *sigh* (Mina obviously doesn't know that regardless of gender, policemen call their superiors "sir". Wait, Mina isn't their boss, so...)  
Mina: Anyway, could you help me out?  
Forensics 1: What is it you need help with?  
Mina: I kinda dropped something underneath a cabinet, but I can't reach it. Can you help move it out of the way?  
Forensics 1: Um...  
Mina: Pleeeeeease? *wink*  
Forensics 1: Y-Yes, sir! No problem, sir!  
Forensics 2: Anything for a lady in distress!  
Edgeworth: (How chivalrous.)

The heavy cabinet was moved away with the help of the two policemen.

Forensics 1: Oof! It's so heavy!  
Forensics 2: Ugh! Just a little more!  
Forensics 1: Huh? There's nothing underneath.  
Mina: Uh? Um... Well, maybe it was somewhere else...  
Forensics 2: Do you need help with-  
Mina: *sweats* Oh! It's okay for now! You can go now! Oh, and thanks... boys. *wink*  
Forensics 1: The pleasure is mine!  
Forensics 2: No, no, the pleasure is all mine!  
Edgeworth: Y-You can get back to work now!  
Forensics 1 and 2: Y-Yes sir!  
Mina: Hee hee. What do you think, Edgey? Using my feminine charms like that?  
Edgeworth: (In all truth, Mina is not bad-looking, but the way she winked like that just now was really creepy...)  
Mina: Hey! Aren't you going to thank me? ! I helped move your stupid cabinet for you!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Whuh! O-Of course! Thanks, Mina! So... what have we here?  
Mina: Um... There's nothing strange.  
Edgeworth: Wait! There are a few specks of blood on the rug!  
Mina: Y-You're right! Could this be the victim's blood? !  
Edgeworth: So this was what the cabinet was hiding. It was dragged here to conceal this spot!  
Mina: That makes Mr Minamimoto very suspicious! He must've moved this cabinet here!  
Edgeworth: Yes, but... If the blood is only on the floor, why couldn't he have used, say, that set of drawers over there, which is much smaller and easier to move?  
Mina: Hmmm... Yeah, why?

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Large filing cabinet  
**The large filing cabinet was moved from its usual place to the wall beside the door.

Edgeworth: Lab guy!  
Forensics: Yes, sir!  
Edgeworth: Please check for me whose blood is on the rug here.  
Forensics: Not a problem, sir!  
Edgeworth: And while you're at it, get someone else to perform a Luminol test on the area surrounding this spot!  
Forensics: Yes, sir! This will take some time, so please sit back and relax!

While the first lab guy went to work determining the owner of the spilt blood, the second guy sprayed Luminol on the rug and a bit of the wall above it.

Mina: L-Look, Edgey! There's an ugly blue blotch appearing... like magic!  
Edgeworth: That's the shape the blood formed when it was spilt. There's some on the wall. In fact, it looks like a line... Maybe it's a trail of blood.  
Mina: A trail? ! Th-Then it probably came from...  
Edgeworth: Yes, further up the wall. Lab guy, please spray Luminol all over here.  
Forensics: Yes, sir!

And when he did... a horrible sight awaited them...

Mina: EEEEK!  
Forensics: S-Sir...  
Edgeworth: It's as I suspected.

On the wall in front of them was a large patch of invisible blood, which glowed a livid blue under the harsh ultraviolet light.

Edgeworth: Blood dripped down the wall from this spot and down to the rug.  
Mina: Mmmngh... How could... How could something like this happen...  
Edgeworth: Murder is always ugly, Mina.

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Big patch of blood on wall  
**A lot of blood was cleaned off the wall. Some of it dripped down to the rug.

Forensics: Mr Edgeworth, sir! I have the results of the blood test that you wanted me to perform!  
Edgeworth: What have you got?  
Forensics: The blood on the rug belongs to the victim, Ms Konishi!  
Edgeworth: *smiles* Thank you both, you've been a great help. And now, let's see what I can deduce by connecting the pieces together!

**LOGIC CONNECTION:**

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Large filing cabinet  
**The large filing cabinet was moved from its usual place to the wall beside the door.

AND

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Big patch of blood on wall  
**A lot of blood was cleaned off the wall. Some of it dripped down to the rug.

Edgeworth: The blood on the rug, which is the victim's blood, had trickled down the wall from this large spot of blood. We can safely say that all the blood found so far belongs to Ms Konishi.  
Mina: Yeah. Poor Ms Konishi...  
Edgeworth: The real crime scene is Mr Minamimoto's cubicle. That should be pretty obvious now.  
Mina: I agree.  
Edgeworth: The killer saw the mess that he created on the wall, and knew he had to clean it off, which he did. But it's impossible to clean bloodstains off of a rug unless you wash it, which in turn is impossible to do considering that it is firmly affixed to the floor.  
Mina: So he moved his filing cabinet here to hide the bloody part of the rug...  
Edgeworth: That's right. Now here's where things get a little bit more interesting.  
Mina: Only you would call a gruesome scene like this interesting!  
Edgeworth: A-Anyway, Mina! The killer is not a dumb person. He must know that blood shows up clearly in a Luminol test, so he specifically used a very tall cabinet to hide the wall.  
Mina: The killer was afraid that the police would perform a Luminol test on that wall, huh?  
Edgeworth: Correct. Which is why he had to conceal it. He killed two birds with one stone with that cabinet. Because both the rug and wall would be covered up!  
Mina: I see!

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Large filing cabinet  
**Was moved from its usual spot. Found hugging the wall where wiped-down bloodstains were found. Was also hiding a piece of the rug underneath that had blood on it. It's so heavy it requires two people to carry.]

[**EVIDENCE** acquired.

**Bloodstains**  
Enormous bloodstains wiped away from the wall in Sho Minamimoto's cubicle, but made visible again with Luminol.]

Mina: But if the police moved his cabinet and performed a Luminol test anyway, wouldn't he be... uh, screwed?  
Edgeworth: He probably was well-aware of that fact. His strategy isn't foolproof, but at the very least, he'd stall them long enough to think of a valid excuse. So we have to be careful when cross-examining him.  
Mina: Then... Mr Minamimoto... He must be the killer!  
Edgeworth: My thoughts exactly.  
Mina: I'll... I'll help you, Edgey! I'm gonna help you nail him! So let's cross-examine him together!  
Edgeworth: *chuckles* I like your enthusiasm, Mina. I'm glad you agree with my line of thinking. Now let's wrap up our investigation and ask him some very tough questions...  
Mina: Yeah! And if we beat him, I'm gonna demand that he give me a set of straight A's in Mathematics for the rest of the year!  
Edgeworth: I don't think that's possible if he gets arrested...  
Mina: Um... Then at the very least, I'll demand that he... hand over all those limited-edition pins that he has!  
Edgeworth: Mina, isn't that blackmailing?

**INVESTIGATION COMPLETE**

Edgeworth: (There's no turning back... It's time to finish this. It's sink or swim!)

**TO BE CONTINUED…**


	4. Chapter 4

**TURNABOUT HIGHSCHOOL, Part 4  
by BrDPirateMan  
****Genre: Crime / Mystery / Parody / Cross-over  
**

**March 14, 4:37 pm  
Seiko High School  
Staff Room  
**  
Everyone regrouped in the staff room. There was Edgeworth, flanked by Mina. Detective Megumi Kitaniji and Sho Minamimoto, along with Neku, Shiki, Beat, Ai, the cheerleaders and the security guard Mr Koki Kariya were present too. So were the forensics team. The exception was Eri, who had been detained at the police station.

Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, is there something you'd like to tell us? You had wanted everyone to gather round here.  
Edgeworth: *taps the side of his head, smiling* I'm ready to solve this case once and for all, Detective Kitaniji.  
Megumi: You found the killer? !  
Edgeworth: *points directly at Sho* Yes... I hereby indict Mr Sho Minamimoto as the real murderer!  
Shiki: What? !  
Neku: So he's the one? !  
Beat: BWAAAAH!  
Ai: Seriously? !  
All the other girls: Mr Minamimoto... a killer? !  
Forensics: Sir!  
Sho: Heh heh heh... Are you sure now, Mr Edgeworth? Is this a challenge to see who's smarter?  
Edgeworth: I'm not interested in petty challenges, Mr Minamimoto. I just want to prove your guilt. And that's that. For that is my job... as a prosecutor!  
Mina: *angry* You can't run away now, Mr Minamimoto! We found overwhelming proof that you're the one responsible for Ms Konishi's death! And we're gonna make you admit it!  
Sho: Heh. Hahahahaha! This is so zetta amusing! Let's see you try.  
Edgeworth: *wags finger* Ho ho. Now, if you please, let us hear what you have to say about this.  
Sho: Aight... hectopascals. Whatever makes you happy.  
Megumi: Mr Minamimoto, I beg of you, please refrain from personal attacks-  
Sho: Shut up! This is my fight. And I don't need some lame detective getting in my way! Inverse matrix!  
Megumi: *recoils* Guh!  
Mina: It's go time! Raaargh!  
Ai: *sweats* Mina... you sound just like an aggresive animal...

**TESTIMONY by Sho Minamimoto  
Sho's Alibi  
**  
Sho: I came here to work overtime.  
I was in the staff room starting from 10 am onwards.  
But when lunchtime came, I saw it fit to have a nice zetta meal.  
It was two hours before I got back to work.

Mina: *sweats* What, that's it? Can you be any more ambiguous? !  
Sho: Heh! You wanted a challenge? There you go! Dumb 000s.  
Edgeworth: Mmmph... (It looks like the only way I'll be able to make any progress is to press him for details. There's just too little to work on as is.)  
Mina: Who you calling dumb? ! Those math tips you give all suck, anyway!  
Ai: *sweats* M-Mina, calm down...  
Shiki: She's going hyper!  
Edgeworth: Ahem! I will now begin my cross-examination! So please, I ask for everyone's cooperation. Thank you.

**REBUTTAL  
Sho's Alibi  
**  
Sho: [_I came here to work overtime._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Why did you have to work overtime?  
Sho: There was a whole bunch of test papers I had to mark for another class. Zetta hectopascals that they were... to completely fail it! All of them get a factoring zero! ! !  
Edgeworth: (If this lunatic's logic is anything to go by, his tests would consist of PhD-level mathematics questions...)  
Mina: Incidentally, how exactly did I do in that pop quiz?  
Sho: Heh heh heh...  
Mina: Wh-What? D-Don't tell me I really... *sigh*  
Edgeworth: Let's leave those questions for later, Mina.  
Sho: So anyway, I was here in this cubicle for the morning.

Sho: [_I was in the staff room starting from 10 am onwards._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: According to the teachers' logbook, you did sign in at around 10 am.  
Sho: What? You want to dispute that, too? Heh! It's just like you lawyers to find fault in everything. Zetta awful.  
Edgeworth: Are you sure you were marking test papers and not doing anything else?  
Sho: Of course not. You can't mark test papers all the time. We all need a break every now and then. In the breaks that I often give myself, I spend them solving some differentiation questions!  
Mina: *sweats* I can't believe he'd think math is a relaxing hobby...  
Sho: Hah! That's because you fail to see the many beautiful things in math! How simultaneous equations go hand-in-hand with each other! How the numbers in pi are so wonderfully varied! The sexiness of the curves of a cubic equation!  
Megumi: *recoils* S-Sexiness? !  
Sho: Of course! Don't you think if you draw the right equations on a graph, you can create an image of a well-endowed wo-  
Edgeworth: *stern* I think we've heard enough of your mathematical ramblings, Mr Minamimoto!  
Mina: *sweats* I'm glad you stopped him, Edgey. If you didn't, he could go on for days about his sines and cosines.  
Edgeworth: (His obsession with mathematics is really disturbing, that's for sure...)

Sho: [_But when lunchtime came, I saw it fit to have a nice zetta meal._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: So you didn't go on working during lunch, did you?  
Sho: Of course not. Even a genius has to eat.  
Edgeworth: Well then, where did you go for lunch?  
Sho: Um, th-that's easy! You know that new ramen place in Dogenzaka? It just opened up, and I went there for lunch. The noodles there are really tasty. Mmm, it makes me hungry for pi!  
Edgeworth: (Aha! I got you now...) Mr Minamimoto, I'd like you to append that last statement to your testimony.  
Sho: Which part? That I'm hungry for pi?  
Edgeworth: *stern gaze* No! The fact that you went out for lunch!  
Sho: Aight... So I was hungry, right? And so...

Sho: [_I went out for a nice bowl of ramen at that new ramen shop that just opened up._]

[**EVIDENCE - List of attendees**]

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: So tell me, how were the noodles?  
Sho: Oh, very nice! The flavours mesh perfectly like simultaneous equations. And the taste is like a tangent whose gradient is not too steep, nor too shallow.  
Edgeworth: Was it your first time?  
Sho: Yeah, it's the first time I've been there, but I think I'll go there everyday from now on.  
Edgeworth: Glad to hear that you like it... considering that you never went out today!  
Sho: What?  
Edgeworth: The security guard Ms Uzuki Yashiro gave me a list of the people who came to school today. According to the logbooks, NO ONE left the school premises ever since they arrived. That includes you.  
Sho: *sweats* Uh... Oof!  
Edgeworth: You were here in school the whole time... And you were here during lunchtime!  
Mina: I'll bet you were here in the cubicle the whole time too!  
Sho: Wait...Wait. That's not true.  
Edgeworth: ?  
Sho: Hahaha! I guess even genuises like me make mistakes. Yeah, now I remember! I didn't go out at all. I was in school...but I was not in my cubicle for a period of time!  
Edgeworth: Then let's hear it. Tell us where you were.

**TESTIMONY by Sho Minamimoto  
Sho's Alibi, Pt 2  
**  
Sho: Before noon came, I decided to take a long break from my work.  
After all, it's strictly not a zetta schoolday, so I can do whatever I please.  
There was a period of time when I was not in my cubicle.  
And after that, I went back to my cubicle.

Mina: You weren't in your cubicle? !  
Sho: If you don't believe me, too bad.  
Megumi: But Mr Minamimoto, can you prove it?  
Sho: I can't.  
Megumi: What? ! Then what is the meaning of this? !  
Sho: It's not like you can prove that I was in my cubicle, right? ! Heh, so zetta slow!  
Edgeworth: Enough, Mr Minamimoto! We don't have all day!

**REBUTTAL  
Sho's Alibi, Pt 2  
**  
Sho: [_Before noon came, I decided to take a long break from my work._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: You were marking test papers, as I remember it.  
Mina: *sweats* Don't remind me, Edgey... It hurts to have salt rubbed in the wound.  
Edgeworth: (Well, it's your fault to begin with for not studying hard for your pop quiz...)  
Sho: Don't worry, kids. After this, I'll have a special deluxe pop quiz waiting for you... with over 9000 questions! ! ! *maniacal laugh*  
Mina: N-N-Noooo! ! !  
Ai: What! ! !  
Beat: BWAAAAH!  
Neku: Whuh? !  
Shiki: No way!  
Mina: *pinches Edgeworth* Hurry up, Edgey! ! !  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Wh-What? !  
Mina: We gotta prove him guilty NOW! If we can't, he'll give us even more difficult math tests!  
Edgeworth: (Instead of quaking with fear and anticipation of the next test, can't you actually work hard and do your revision? !)

Sho: [_After all, it's strictly not a zetta schoolday, so I can do whatever I please._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: Do you always come back to school on Saturdays?  
Sho: I do that a lot, but not all the time. I'm sure the security guard can tell you more.  
Kariya: Well, it's the truth, Mr Edgeworth. His name can be seen on almost every Saturday in the teachers' logbook.  
Edgeworth: I see. And what do you normally do on those Saturdays?  
Sho: It's all work-related, Mr Edgeworth. A teacher's job is never complete at any time. What with all the homework to mark, tests to think up...  
Mina: So this is where he cooks up all those ridiculously hard math tests! This cubicle is his very secret lair of evil!  
Sho: Heh... You can't even begin to imagine how much fun I have in store for you kids for your end-of-year exam...  
Mina: What? ! You finalised the final exam too? !  
Beat: BWAAAAH! We're doomed, yo!  
Edgeworth: So anyway! The fact is, you were here in school today, Mr Minamimoto!  
Sho: Yeah, I was here, but...

Sho: [_There was a period of time when I was not in my cubicle._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: You were not in your cubicle... so where were you?  
Sho: I went to the computer labs, to surf the net and such.  
Edgeworth: I was under the impression that the computer labs here are used only by the students.  
Mina: Well, most of the time it's us students who use them, but really, anyone can have access to the computer labs.  
Edgeworth: I see...  
Sho: I often make surprise trips to that place, to see if any students have been playing games on the computers... which, of course, is against the rules here... right, Daisukenojo?  
Beat: BWAAAAH! Dontchu say my real name, yo! It's Beat! And... uh, well, why do you ask anyway? !  
Sho: Because there was one Saturday when I spied you through the window. You were so busy playing online poker that you totally failed to see me! Hahaha!  
Beat: BWAAAAH! You you you you you... you saw me? ! ? !  
Mina: *sweats* Well, I guess we've got another guilty party on our hands.  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto, when did you leave your cubicle?  
Sho: Let's see... I wanted to take a breather, and that's at about 11:30 am.  
Edgeworth: Half past eleven?  
Sho: Yeah, so I was in the computer labs from 11:30 am. I was there for an hour.  
Edgeworth: That part of your testimony was very important. I'd like to hear it one more time.  
Sho: Why not hear it 3.1428571 times? !  
Edgeworth: J-Just once will do!

Sho: [_At about 11:30 am, I went to the computer labs, where I stayed for about an hour._]

**HOLD IT!**

Edgeworth: So tell me again. You were in the computer labs from 11:30 am to 12:30 pm?  
Sho: If you can't work out the math in that simple problem, you're not worthy of being a human being!  
Edgeworth: (It's killers like you who aren't worthy!)  
Mina: What were you doing there?  
Sho: Huh? For a moment, I thought you were going to insult me, saying that I was surfing "boring" mathematics websites and such. But you know what? ! You can't insult me, 'cause that's the truth! I was looking up ! ! !  
Shiki: *sweats* I don't think a website like that exists at all...  
Sho: Just kidding. Well, being the math genius that I am, yes, I was looking at a whole bunch of sites. Delving into the world of matrices and determinants...  
Mina: *sweats* This guy has no life.  
Edgeworth: (Hmmm... What he said was contradictory to what I know... I'll raise an objection!)

**OBJECTION!**

Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto, you were most certainly NOT at the computer labs at that time! And I can prove it!  
Sho: Oh yeah? ! Haha! Let's see you try to prove it... little hectopascal.  
Edgeworth: You couldn't have been at the labs for an hour from 11:30 am onwards, because of this!

[**EVIDENCE - Eri's cell phone**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto, I think you should know who this phone belongs to.  
Sho: Hey, that's Er- uh, I mean, n-no, I don't know whose phone that is. Though it's zetta safe to assume it's a girl's phone! H-Haha! Maybe it's y-yours, Mr Edgeworth...  
Edgeworth: *smiles* I detected a slight quiver to your voice in that last sentence... But no matter. What's important is the content of this phone.  
Mina: I'll read it for you, Edgey. Everyone, listen up! This is a message that Eri received today on her phone... "My dear Eri, are you free today? I want to see you; I'm so lonely. :( My place. I'll be in my cubicle all the way from 11 am to 1 pm. Don't worry it's Saturday, there's no one in the staff room. See you there."  
Megumi: Mr Edgeworth, what is the meaning of this? ! Don't tell me this is another one of your sick jokes! ! !  
Edgeworth: *recoils* It's not a joke! Look, the sender of this message is called "Hubby" on her phone, but the real identity of this person is someone in this very room right now...  
Sho: *sweats* A-Am I on Candid Camera or something? !  
Edgeworth: The sender of this message is this person!

[**PROFILES - Sho Minamimoto**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Shiki: What? Sho sent her that message? Why?  
Edgeworth: That's because he's Eri's boyfriend!  
Ai: Seriously? !  
Beat: BWAAAH! Whatchu say, yo? ! You sayin' she goin' out wit dis math freak? !  
Edgeworth: Yes. Eri and Mr Minamimoto are lovers. Earlier today, he sent this message to her with the intention of arranging a date for the two of them... here, in his cubicle!  
Mina: He also said that he'd wait for her here from 11 am to 1 pm!  
Edgeworth: So what Mr Minamimoto testified about being in the computer labs from 11:30 am to 12:30 pm is false! He was waiting here all along!

**HOLD IT!**

Sho: You... factoring hectopascals... Supposing I really did send that message... what makes you think I was really waiting in my cubicle from 11 to 1? !  
Megumi: Hmmm. He has a point, Mr Edgeworth. It's very likely that he could have ignored this... date... and went elsewhere during that timeframe.  
Edgeworth: No. I'm positive he was here the whole time, waiting for her. And the evidence that proves it is this!

[**EVIDENCE - Matching pendants**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Edgeworth: Have any of you noticed that Eri was wearing a rather striking pendant?  
Shiki: Uh... She had this plus sign-shaped pendant round her neck...  
Ai: It was black and pink.  
Neku: Actually, I noticed it too.  
Edgeworth: Eri said that it's unique. It was crafted in a jewellery shop and cannot be found anywhere else in the world. She also only received it today.  
Megumi: So what's your point, Mr Edgeworth?  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto wears a pendant that is identical to hers!  
Shiki: Really? !  
Edgeworth: *smiles* It was by chance that we saw his pendant... But thanks to those few seconds, we were able to conclude so much about him.  
Sho: *sweats* Rrgh...  
Edgeworth: The matching pendants also strengthens the fact that they're going out. How many couples have we all seen wearing the same shirts? This is a similar case.  
Megumi: Mr Minamimoto, show us the pendant that you're wearing now.  
Sho: Wha... No! This is a zetta crime you're committing! Invasion of privacy! You're low, all of you irrational numbers!  
Megumi: *stern* Now, Mr Minamimoto! Men!  
Forensics: Yes sir!  
Sho: Don't touch meeee! No! Noooooooooo! ! !

...

The policemen managed to forcibly extract Sho's pendant, which was kept hidden inside his shirt. It dangled from the hand of one of the officers, and everyone noted it was shaped like a plus sign, and that it was black and pink.

Megumi: Aha! So this proves that you and Eri are together!  
Sho: Grrr! You! Edgeworth! What's the factor is wrong with you? ! Are you out for revenge or something? ! Embarrassing me like this!  
Edgeworth: I'm simply doing what I must. I'll summarise what I know for everyone's benefit: Mr Minamimoto messaged Eri to come over to his cubicle in this very staff room, where he promised to wait from 11 am to 1 pm. Eri came and their date began, during which he gave her one of a pair of pendants he had made in a jewellery store. The fact that Eri is wearing her pendant is proof enough that Mr Minamimoto was in his cubicle from 11 to 1! Also meaning he was in his cubicle at the time of the murder!  
Sho: Ha! You're forgetting one thing!  
Edgeworth: ?  
Sho: The sender is "Hubby", right? How can you prove that it's me? ! Huh? !  
Edgeworth: I could explain why, but that would take too long. Because there is one very simple way to show that you are "Hubby"! Mina, you've got Eri's phone with you, right?  
Mina: Yup! I think I know what to do! Leave it to me, Edgey!  
Megumi: What are you going to do with Eri's phone?  
Mina: I'm gonna dial "Hubby's" number! It's in the memory of her phone. *grins* And then we'll see who "Hubby" really is!  
Sho: *sweats* Y-You can't...  
Edgeworth: I ask everyone to listen carefully...

Soon, a curious ringtone echoed in the staff room.

Ringtone: "Do, a deer, a female deer; Re, a drop of golden sun..."  
Megumi: *recoils* Wh-Where is that horrible ringtone coming from? !  
Beat: Yo man, it's... BWAAAH! It's comin' from Mr Minamimoto!  
Megumi: Men, search him! Get his phone!  
Forensics: I got it, sir!

The policeman held up Mr Minamimoto's phone, which was screaming a tune from "The Sound Of Music". On the display read the words: "Incoming call: Eri"

Mina: *ends call* I think that settles that... "Hubby"!  
Edgeworth: "Hubby" and Mr Minamimoto... are one and the same! I don't know how many times I've said this by now, but just for the sake of reminding you, he and Eri... are lovers!  
Beat: For real, yo? ! 'Cause that ringtone just now... BWAHAHAHA! I didn't know you use such a stupid ringtone, Mr Minamimoto! BWAHAHAHAHA! ! !  
Sho: Grrr... Shut up, you son of a digit! ! !  
Mina: Hee hee. I love how things fall into place so...perfectly.  
Megumi: Whew... We got sidetracked so much, Mr Edgeworth, so allow me to bring us all back.  
Edgeworth: Gladly.  
Megumi: So far we've proven that Mr Minamimoto was in his office at 12 pm. But what does this have in relation to our case?  
Edgeworth: (This is it! It's time to finally tie him to the murder!) A lot. Because we found two pieces of very incriminating evidence in his cubicle!  
Megumi: Then let's hear it. What's the first piece of evidence?

[**EVIDENCE - Glass shards**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Edgeworth: We found these pieces of glass in Mr Minamimoto's wastepaper basket.  
Megumi: What are these exactly?  
Edgeworth: This glass originally came from Ms Konishi's spectacles. If you piece them together, they roughly form a pair of lenses that fit into the now-empty frame.  
Sho: *sweats* They were found... in my dustbin? ! Of all the zetta...! ! !  
Megumi: Hmmm... Exactly what were they doing in there, Mr Minamimoto? Maybe you can tell us.  
Sho: This... It's a conspiracy! I knew zero- no, negative 100 percent about this!  
Megumi: Interesting, Mr Edgeworth. Please, continue. What's the second piece of evidence?  
Edgeworth: The other piece is...

[**EVIDENCE - Bloodstains**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Everyone: *shocked* ! ! !  
Neku: Whoa! Look at that!  
Edgeworth: This is what we found out when we performed a Luminol test on the wall next to the door in Mr Minamimoto's cubicle. Now, you know that Luminol confirms the presence of blood even when it is wiped away. No amount of cleaning can wipe away the truth, literally.  
Sho: *sweats* What the digit? !  
Edgeworth: This is the victim's blood that is splattered all over the wall!  
Megumi: But how did you prove it's blood from the victim? Even though we know that there used to be blood all over the wall, we don't know who it belongs to because it's all been wiped away.  
Edgeworth: Look carefully at the blood. It trailed down the wall and a little of it soaked into the rug on the floor.  
Megumi: Ah! I get it. It's possible to take samples of the rug that is soaked with blood and check them all the same! Well, lab boys? I'm assuming Mr Edgeworth asked for your help.  
Forensics: Yes sir! It's the victim's blood, sir!  
Sho: *sweats* Ungraaah...  
Neku: So it was you, Mr Minamimoto! You killed Ms Konishi, and made me a scapegoat! You dirty scumbag!  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto would be easily found out if he left the wall exposed like that; he obviously knows about the properties of Luminol. And the bloodied rug doesn't help matters much. Which is why he had to hide it all with this!

[**EVIDENCE - Large filing cabinet**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Edgeworth: Anything could have been used to cover the rug, but this cabinet is the only thing in his office that's tall enough to hide the invisible bloodstains on the wall.  
Megumi: I see! *nods*  
Edgeworth: There was one little clue which led to the discovery of this treasure cove of evidence, Detective Kitaniji. If you look carefully at another part of the floor, you can see markings of the feet of a cabinet.  
Mina: The large filing cabinet used to stand here in this spot! You can see signs of it being moved!  
Megumi: How so?  
Edgeworth: Do you see the dustless circles on the floor? They are where the feet of the cabinet stood.  
Mina: And only that cabinet has circular feet!  
Megumi: Mmmm! Intriguing. So the killer moved it from its usual spot, here, to the bloodied wall! And by doing so, he'd conceal the rug at the same time!  
Edgeworth: Exactly! But there's no way he could move the large filing cabinet all by himself because it's simply too heavy. When I asked for it to be moved, it took two policemen to carry it. Which leads me to believe there was someone who helped him in all this.  
Sho: *sweats* You... Are you saying I had an accomplice? ! Z-Zetta nonsense!  
Edgeworth: To cover up for this crime, you had to cooperate with this person!

[**PROFILES - Eri**]

**TAKE THAT!**

Sho: Whuh? !  
Mina: Eri's his accomplice? !  
Shiki: E-Eri is...? !  
Edgeworth: Yes. Our math fetishist worked together with Eri to shift the blame away from himself. Only together were they able to move the cabinet! You see, when I first talked to Eri today...

(Flashback to about 3:25 pm.)

Eri: Ow... My arms...  
Mina: Eri, what's wrong?  
Eri: Huh? Oh, nothing... My arms hurt because I've been doing so much spring cleaning.

...

Edgeworth: Eri was complaining of a pair of very painful arms, but the spring cleaning was merely an excuse for the real reason her arms hurt!  
Sho: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: Her arms were throbbing because she helped you move that heavy filing cabinet, Mr Minamimoto!  
Megumi: Oh!  
Shiki: Eri did that? !  
Sho: *sweats* This is ridiculous! I'd never involve Eri in something like that! Not that I'm involved in any way myself but... Why do you say she would want to help? !  
Edgeworth: *smiles* Because she was more than willing to assist you. After all, she loves you and would do anything for you. Yes, Eri was a witness to the murder itself! She saw it happen in front of her with her own eyes!  
Shiki: She did? !  
Neku: I can't believe it myself!  
Ai: Her? ! A witness? !  
Edgeworth: That's also why she helped to lie for you, Mr Minamimoto! The two of you... are partners-in-crime!  
Megumi: Hmmm... Hmmm... Hmmm! ! !  
Mina: *sweats* Detective, will you stop "Hmmm"ing already? !  
Edgeworth: What about it, Mr Minamimoto? !  
Sho: *slouching deeply* Rrrghh heh heh heh...  
Edgeworth: ? !  
Mina: Wh-What's with that creepy laugh? !  
Sho: I think you lot of hectopascals... *suddenly straightens up* ...are forgetting one important thing!  
Edgeworth: One... thing?  
Sho: Heh heh heh... Wahahahaha! This is all too much. Raahahahaha! First we talk about my alibi, then we make a 180 degree turn and talk about my darn filing cabinet! Really... You're all too much! Hahehihohu! ! ! Heh heh heh...  
Mina: Ugh... Mr Minamimoto looks like a completely different person now... And it's kinda creepy in a sick and totally disgusting way!  
Edgeworth: Spit it out, Mr Minamimoto, instead of wasting time acting like a total idiot! What is it that you claim we forgot?  
Sho: Heh heh heh... All this while you've been saying I'm the killer... But do you know HOW Ms Konishi was killed? !  
Edgeworth: !  
Sho: That's right! You haven't found the murder weapon yet, have you? ! Then how do you suppose I killed her? !  
Mina: Wha- Oh no, Edgey, he's right! Detective Kitaniji! Um, have your men found any murder weapons? Anything? ? ?  
Megumi: *recoils* Unfortunately... no. Nothing at all...  
Sho: Hahahaha! You're all the same. A WHOLE STINKING BUNCH OF FACTORING HECTOPASCALS! ! SOH-CAH-TOAAAAAAA! ! ! ! !  
Mina: E-Edgey, can't we do something? !  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Unngh! I hate to admit it, but Mr Minamimoto has a point! Without a murder weapon to tie him to the crime, there's no way we can convict him at all!  
Mina: B-But... if we can't prove it now, he'll go home scot-free!  
Sho: Hahaha! That's what happens to weak logic. First it gets subtracted... then it gets rounded off to zero, and poof! Wrong answer! D minus, just like your grade, Mina!  
Mina: *shocked* Wh-Wh-What? ! I got a D- in my pop quiz? !  
Neku: But he's clearly the killer!  
Shiki: Y-Yeah! You can't give up now, Mr Edgeworth!  
Beat: He been messin' wit our heads this whole time! He oughta get kicked in the behind, yo!  
Ai: Mr Minamimoto mustn't get away! He's guilty!  
Megumi: Oh dear, what should we do, Mr Edgeworth?  
Mina: Edgey!

...

Edgeworth: (Grrr... It's my fault that I didn't take the murder weapon into account. But if I think through this carefully, with Logic, I CAN win this fight! Let's see... Ms Konishi had experienced blunt trauma to the head. And her blood gushed out of the only wound on her head...)

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Blood on wall**  
How did blood from the victim's head end up on the wall?

Edgeworth: (Now, I'll just think things through, and...)

**LOGIC CONNECTION:**

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Missing murder weapon**  
The murder weapon is nowhere to be found. What exactly was used to kill Ms Konishi?

AND

**LOGIC FRAGMENT - Blood on wall  
**How did blood from the victim's head end up on the wall?

Edgeworth: The question here is how so much blood could have sprung from her head wound to the wall. Assuming a weapon was used, the cause of death was blunt trauma, which would make the weapon a blunt one. But it's impossible to transfer so much blood to the wall just by hitting her with it. Even if her head is close to the wall, it wouldn't-

Edgeworth suddenly had a brainwave.

Edgeworth: Wait, that's it! When it comes down to it, the only way Ms Konishi could sustain such an injury, and leave so much blood on the wall...is if her head is close to the wall! I've... I've got it!

...

Mina: Earth to Edgey! What is with you? ! We're in the middle of an argument! ! !  
Edgeworth: I finally understand how the victim was killed!  
Sho: Huh? Hahaha! Really? I'd like to see you try!  
Edgeworth: The murder weapon we've been searching for all this time is simply too large to be one in the first place.  
Megumi: Wh-What on earth? !  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto slammed Ms Konishi's head on the wall to kill her!  
Sho: *sweats* Hnrgh!  
Mina: Whaaa? !  
Edgeworth: He grabbed her head from behind and smashed it into the wall! Don't forget that because of the double layer of blood splatter, it means that he hit her against the wall twice!  
Megumi: H-He did that? !  
Edgeworth: Yes. That is how the victim truly died. He killed her with his bare hands!  
Mina: Oh!  
Edgeworth: This is probably what happened! While Eri and Mr Minamimoto were having their date in his cubicle, Ms Konishi came in and caught them red-handed! They were probably in a compromsing position, but that's not the main point here. It's not allowed for teachers and students to engage in romantic relationships in this school, so Mr Minamimoto knew that if Ms Konishi told the higher-ups, it would be all over for him, his career and his reputation! He simply had to stop her from talking!  
Sho: ...  
Edgeworth: Ms Konishi probably told the two of them off at this point, and as she turned to leave, he attacked her from behind by shoving her head into the wall, not once but twice, thereby killing her. It was when he did this that he completely shattered her glasses in the process too.  
Megumi: I see!  
Edgeworth: Naturally, Eri saw all of this. Mr Minamimoto knew he had to cover up his act, so he had Eri help him clean up as much blood as possible. It was probably Eri who made the fatal mistake of throwing the shards from Ms Konishi's glasses into his wastepaper basket, only to be found by us later.  
Shiki: Eri...  
Edgeworth: But no matter what, the blood on the rug could not be cleaned off, and he knew that the bloodstains on the wall would show up if a Luminol test was performed. So he decided to have the large filing cabinet moved to that spot to hide the evidence! But as it was so heavy, it required the strength of both Mr Minamimoto and his accomplice Eri to budge it. However, in their panic, they failed to notice the marks on the floor that the feet made over time.  
Sho: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: I know that eventually, the police would have to move his belongings away for a better examination of the place, and the bloodstains would be found out sooner or later, but it wouldn't be much later, so until then Mr Minamimoto had some time to think of an excuse to get himself and Eri out of trouble!  
Megumi: Hmmm...  
Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto had to pin the crime on somebody, and it was Eri who gave him the idea of using Neku's baseball bat. She was present during yesterday's baseball practice, so she might probably have an idea where his bat was. All she had to do was find it and hand it to Mr Minamimoto who smeared it in the victim's blood. Then Eri placed it behind the door in the locker area while Mr Minamimoto carried the body downstairs and placed it in front of the janitor's closet, in Corridor W-1.  
Sho: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: *shrugs and shakes head, smiling* Ho ho. Cat got your tongue, Mr Minamimoto?  
Sho: *sweats a lot* You...hecto... Mnnrrgh! A-Anybody else could have done that...  
Megumi: After hearing what Mr Edgeworth had to say, I think that's not possible at all!  
Edgeworth: There's something else, you know, that proves once and for all that Mr Minamimoto is the culprit.  
Megumi: What is it?  
Edgeworth: *smiles* When Neku brought us here and we found the victim on the floor, this happened...

(Flashback to 2:55 pm, Corridor W-1)

Sho: Hey! What're you doing, you hectopascal? !  
Edgeworth: Huh?  
Ai: Mr Minamimoto!  
Sho: Don't touch her! And hurry, call the cops!

Edgeworth: Mr Minamimoto, I remember, at this point, when you first called out to us to call the police, you were still on the landing of the staircase and hadn't come down the stairs.  
Sho: ? !  
Edgeworth: That would contradict greatly with this piece of evidence!

[**EVIDENCE - Crime scene notes**]

**TAKE THAT!  
**

Edgeworth: I ask you to look here…

_MAP OF CRIME SCENE  
_

|SHO |

|^^^^|-XXX-

... … … …V

X = door (janitor's closet)  
V = location of victim's body (_please ignore the dots_)  
^ = stairs  
SHO = Sho Minamimoto's location

Edgeworth: From where you were standing then, it would have been impossible to see the victim's body, which was splayed out in front of the janitor's closet, completely out of view!  
Sho: *sweats* Whuh... Ungh!  
Edgeworth: And yet, how is it that you could tell us to call the police... when you hadn't even seen the body yet? !  
Sho: ...!  
Edgeworth: *chuckle* From where I was crouching, near the victim's body, I could not see you, Mr Minamimoto. Only when I stood in front of the staircase did I see you start to climb down the stairs! And I'm sure the rest of you can say that fact is real, right?  
Ai: Y-Yeah, I was there...  
Mina: That's right. You'd have to be at the foot of the stairs to see the landing.  
Beat: Dude, yo, that makes perfect sense...  
Shiki: I agree.  
Sho: Guh! You kids...  
Edgeworth: This means you KNEW the location of Ms Konishi's body! So you're the one who brought her body to Corridor W-1!  
Sho: *sweats* Mmmngh!  
Edgeworth: Also... You urgently shouted at me not to touch Ms Konishi and to call the police. Now, we all thought she was merely unconscious. The truth, of course, is that she was dead. At first glance, there is absolutely no way to tell if she was alive or not!  
Sho: *recoils* ...!  
Edgeworth: The course of action a person would normally take in such a situation is to call an ambulance, which was exactly our plan. Yet you told us to call the police. Now why did you insist that we do so?  
Sho: *sweats* Guh...! That... I...  
Edgeworth: I'll tell you why. It's because there was no point in calling an ambulance! You KNEW she was already dead!  
Sho: *sweats* Aaaghn!  
Edgeworth: And you knew she was dead... because you killed her!  
Sho: *sweats* ... 3.1428571428 57142857142 857142857142 857142857142 857142857142 857142857142 857142857142 857142857142...! SINE COSINE TANGENT SOHCAHTOA! SOME OLD HORSES CAN ALWAYS HEAR THEIR OWNERS APPROACH ONE TWO THREE FOUR FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT NINE TEN 9+5=14 70-32=38 34819*71209=24794261712117… sin(360) = sin(180) = sin(0) = 0 I... WAS... TOO... ZETTA... SLOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOW! ! ! ! ! ! ! *faints* *CRUNCH!*

...

(Flashback to just before the murder.)

Konishi: Mr Minamimoto! What is the meaning of getting yourself involved in a relationship with one of your students? !  
Sho: Wait... Ms Konishi! This...  
Konishi: Don't you know it's against the rules of this school? ! If someone were to see you both shamelessly hugging like that, there would be a scandal! Our school's reputation will be ruined!  
Sho: But...! I'm in love with her... What's so zetta wrong with that? ! I'm a human too!  
Konishi: Look! Rules are rules! You simply cannot break them. And this is unforgivable. Mr Minamimoto, you leave me no choice but report this to the principal.  
Eri: No, Ms Konishi, please!  
Sho: Y-You can't do this! Ms Konishi! ! !  
Konishi: I've had enough. I'll be off for now. Look forward to your talking-to, you two.  
Sho: Grrr... You... I wouldn't allow it! ! !

*WHAM!*

Eri: Eeek!  
Sho: One more time, you witch!

*WHAM!*

Eri: Sh-Sho...  
Sho: *pant* *pant* ...  
Eri: Sho!  
Sho: *pant* *pant* H-How... How did this happen... It's not supposed to be like this... I don't have a choice now. I'm going to have to cover this up.  
Eri: But what will we do? !  
Sho: Don't worry, I think I've already thought of something. It's nothing a prodigy like me can't handle. But I need you to help me...  
Eri: Are you sure this will be alright? !  
Sho: Better than being caught by the cops.  
Eri: A-Alright... I'll help you... for your sake...

...

Edgeworth: (After a long and tiring afternoon, the mystery was finally solved. Sho Minamimoto was arrested on suspicion of murder. His lover and partner-in-crime, Eri, was arrested too for being an accomplice and for disruption of justice. Who would have thought that cases would follow me wherever I go...? Am I forever afflicted with this... "negativity magnetism"? Oh well...)  
Mina: Edgey!  
Edgeworth: Yes?  
Mina: You did it! *hugs Edgeworth* You really did it! The real killer was arrested thanks to you! You're a hero!  
Edgeworth: *chuckles* I'm only doing my job as a prosecutor.  
Shiki: But still, you were amazing, Mr Edgeworth! With just the clues on hand you were able to figure out so much!  
Ai: You're incredible!  
Neku: Mr Edgeworth... Um, thanks! For saving my butt. You're really awesome.  
Edgeworth: *takes a bow* You flatter me too much.  
Shiki: But I can't believe my best friend Eri would dirty her hands on something as serious as a murder...  
Ai: Yeah, I totally didn't know she was going out with Mr Minamimoto at all!  
Neku: I still think she deserved it. Shifting the blame onto me... that was low!  
Mina: Well, yes... Man, I really don't know what to think.  
Edgeworth: (The truth can sometimes be hard to face... but it must be faced nonetheless!) Well, it's getting late. Now that the case is solved, we should probably get back home now, shouldn't we?  
Beat: Yeah, man. Rhyme's prolly waitin' for me by now... But, dude, yo! That was tight!  
Megumi: Mr Edgeworth.  
Edgeworth: Detective!  
Megumi: On behalf of the Japanese Police, I'd like to thank you for your help in solving this case. Please also accept my apologies for suspecting you earlier. But, truly, you have been a great help.  
Edgeworth: *smiles* Like I said, I'm just doing my job. And another thing...it's perfectly normal to make the wrong assumptions in an investigation. We just need to correct them in time.  
Megumi: Hmmm... Yes, of course. Well then, my team and I will be going back now.  
Edgeworth: (Finally peace comes back to this school. I think I'll have a nice meal at a ramen shop...) Well, it's been nice getting to know you, but for now I must be off as well.  
Neku: Alright, later, Mr Edgeworth.  
Shiki: Thank you so much, Mr Edgeworth!  
Ai: ...  
Mina: What's wrong, Ai? You want Edgey's number or something?  
Ai: *blushing* N-No! What gave you that crazy idea?  
Mina: Um... the fact that you're blushing?  
Ai: ...

**March 14, 5:16 pm  
Shibuya  
Scramble Crossing  
**  
Edgeworth and Mina left the school premises at last. As they were walking down the streets of Shibuya...

Mina: Hee hee! Edgey, it felt good to shove all that evidence in Mr Minamimoto's face!  
Edgeworth: I can't agree with you more. *smiles*  
Mina: So where are we going to celebrate?  
Edgeworth: Actually, I was thinking of going straight back to my hotel to rest.  
Mina: What? ! Edgey! You really have no concept of celebration and merry-making!  
Edgeworth: But it's not something I would usually-  
Mina: NO! Edgey! We are heading straight for the nearest sushi restaurant, and that's final!  
Edgeworth: Mina, but-  
Mina: No "but"ing your way out of this one! As your cousin, it's my job to introduce you to the best outlets in Japan!  
Edgeworth: And of course you're expecting me to pay for all our meals.  
Mina: *big grin* Naturally!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Rrrgh! You... I really can't make it! I have important things to do!  
Mina: Oh yeah? ! Then let's see you worm your way out of this one! Thanks to you, I know enough of what cross-examinations are all about.  
Edgeworth: *recoils* You don't mean? !  
Mina: Yeah! You're gonna tell me your story, and I'll point out the lies!  
Edgeworth: Rrgh... Fine. Whatever makes you happy.

**ARGUMENT by Miles Edgeworth  
Edgeworth's Reasons  
**  
Edgeworth: The truth is, tonight I've got an important meeting to attend.  
It's just dinner at Shadow Ramen with a bunch of prosecutor friends who reside here in Japan.  
Some of them are VIPs, too, so I can't afford to miss out on this one.  
Besides, it's getting late and I have to hurry!  
So please, Mina, get this cross-examination over with! ! !

Mina: Hmmm...  
Edgeworth: Look, will you hurry up? I need to go!  
Mina: Come on, Edgey, weren't you the one who said patience is a virtue?  
Edgeworth: I never said anything like that! And while I agree with that concept, now's not the time to apply it!  
Mina: Well, you're not going anywhere until I figure out what's in that head of yours!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Ungh... I'm not gonna make it...

**REBUTTAL  
Edgeworth's Reasons  
**  
Edgeworth: [_The truth is, tonight I've got an important meeting to attend._]

**HOLD IT!**

Mina: What kind of "meeting" is so "important" that you'll totally want to leave your dear cousin behind? !  
Edgeworth: I'm not leaving you behind! It's just-  
Mina: *sniff* Oh, Edgey! How can you be so cruel? ! You meanie meanie meanie!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* I thought this was supposed to be a cross-examination, not a cross-humiliation! Besides, the real reason of the meeting...

Edgeworth: [_It's just dinner at Shadow Ramen with a bunch of prosecutor friends who reside here in Japan._]

**HOLD IT!**

Mina: Dinner with prosecutors? Are you sure this isn't a date?  
Edgeworth: N-No. I don't know many women friends in Japan, if at all.  
Mina: Then how about I introduce you to Ai? She's had this dewy, dreamy gaze in her eyes ever since-  
Edgeworth: *recoils* I am not going out with a student much younger than me! Wouldn't that make me appear like a pervert? !  
Mina: *angry* Then what about the time when you pressed Eri for details on Ms Konishi's... assets? Does that not make you a pervert already? !  
Edgeworth: L-Look, enough of that already! Anyway... this dinner is really important! Because some of those prosecutors...

Edgeworth: [_Some of them are VIPs, too, so I can't afford to miss out on this one._]

**HOLD IT!**

Mina: When you mean "VIP"-  
Edgeworth: It means "Very Important Person", with "important" being the operative word.  
Mina: I know what that means, okay? ! I mean, who are those people you want to meet?  
Edgeworth: They're a group of prosecutors whom I came to know while I was in America. They graduated as law students in America, and have since returned to Japan.  
Mina: That's a nice story, Edgey. Too bad I don't believe it!  
Edgeworth: If you don't believe it, that's too bad.  
Mina: Now you're acting like Mr Minamimoto! I wouldn't be too surprised if you start saying "zetta" in all your sentences.  
Edgeworth: Psh, that's zetta nonsense. *recoils* W-WAIT! I mean, nonsense! JUST NONSENSE! ! !  
Mina: *sweats* Oh well, I rest my case.

Edgeworth: [_Besides, it's getting late and I have to hurry!_]

**HOLD IT!**

Mina: What time does the dinner begin?  
Edgeworth: Um... I-I think it's about now...  
Mina: Give me an exact time, Edgey!  
Edgeworth: Uh, well! It's about 5:30 pm! Yes, that's right! Let go of me, will you? ! I must make haste!  
Mina: Hmmm... That's fishy... That time is rather familiar... Can you add that to your testimony?  
Edgeworth: Rrrmph... I don't see how this is getting us anywhere.

Edgeworth: [_The dinner is at 5:30 pm, so I have to hurry or I'll be late._]

[**EVIDENCE - Shadow Ramen notice**]

**OBJECTION!**

Mina: Edgey, you say you're going to have dinner at Shadow Ramen?  
Edgeworth: Y-Yes, why?  
Mina: Because, if you take a look at this notice that's been circulating round...  
Edgeworth: Huh? *recoils* Wh-Where did you get that?  
Mina: *shrugs and shakes head, smiling* Ho ho ho.  
Edgeworth: And don't imitate me like that, Mina! ! !  
Mina: According to this notice, Shadow Ramen is closed for today from 5:00 pm onwards! There is no way you can even have dinner there at 5:30 pm!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Knngh! But... But why is it closed in the first place? !  
Mina: Beats me. But either way... I now know... that you're lying, Edgey! So we're going to have ramen tonight and that's final!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* Arngh!  
Mina: *grabs Edgeworth's arm* Now come, let's go. My tummy's rumbling.  
Edgeworth: Wait! WAIT! Mina, I really can't go!  
Mina: *angry* Why not? !  
Edgeworth: Because... Because... I have to catch the next episode of "The Steel Samurai", and it starts at 5:30 pm! ! !  
Mina: What? !  
All the bystanders: *sweats* ...  
Edgeworth: *sweats* Um... (Oh, this is just wonderful.)  
Mina: I know you like that kiddie show, Edgey, but... I didn't know you're an even bigger fanboy than I thought!  
Edgeworth: *recoils* OKAY FINE! I admit it! I love the Steel Samurai show! I can't get enough of the special move called "Steel Samurai Sushi Slice"! What's more, this is the much-talked about episode where the Steel Samurai engages in an epic duel with the Evil Magistrate! If I'm late for the show by even one minute I'll hit the roof!  
Mina: *bug-eyed* ... O.O;  
Everyone: *sweats* ... O_O;;;;  
Edgeworth: Let me go, Mina! I'll make it up to you tomorrow! But I absolutely have to be on time for it!  
Mina: Um... sure?

Edgeworth raced off, back to his hotel.

Mina: (My cousin is a kid at heart... Never would have thought he'd be such a Steel Samurai fanatic...)

...

Edgeworth: (I need neither fame nor recognition. Because as a prosecutor, I was just doing the right thing. It doesn't matter how many lies and elaborate tricks are used to cover up a crime. Because as long as I have the power of logic and my sense of justice, the truth will always come to light!)

**THE END**


End file.
